Saturday, May 31, 2025

Saturday, May 31, 2025

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2006. Mattie was four years old and I know exactly why he was holding a balloon and where we got it. That day, we went to our local grocery store. That particular store used to give the children visiting a balloon and a sugar cookie! It was brilliant, because Mattie was always eager to go shopping with me! I only wished every store did this! Just loved that smile! On an aside, can you see the shoes on each step of the staircase? Mattie used to love putting his shoes on the stairs, rather than the closet. I naturally went with it, and after he died, when I eventually removed all the shoes, the stairs never looked the same! 

Quote of the day: Where words fail, music speaks. ~ Hans Christian Andersen

This morning I received a text message and within the conversation I was having was the mention of the Andrew Llyod Webber musical, Song and Dance. This musical was on Broadway in 1985 and 1986. By that point in time, my parents already had moved me across the country to Los Angeles. However, because myself, my mom, and grandmother were home sick, we would fly back and forth from LA to NY often for the first several years. In 1985, I was lucky enough as a teenager to see Bernadette Peters in Song and Dance. This was my first encounter with her, and I immediately fell in love with her stage presence and incredible voice! 

Song and Dance is a VERY unusual Webber musical! Why? Because there is NO scenery and basically no memorable costumes! In fact, there are ONLY two people in the entire musical! The musical was broken down into two acts. Act one, was "Song." Featuring one amazing vocal number after the other performed by Bernadette Peters. The songs highlighted her tumultuous journey with many bad romantic relationships. Keep in mind, she was walking her audience through her journey and there was NO one else on the stage! There were no backdrops or props! Nothing! That is the telltale sign of an amazing performer. Yet as an audience member you are hearing the perspectives of others in her life through pretend phone calls and letters! I am telling you it was clever. I have to admit as a teenager, the true content Bernadette Peters was singing about was over my head! As I had no personal experience with betrayal, lies, infidelity, and abandonment! Nonetheless, even as a teenager, the emotions of what she was expressing caught my attention. That was act one. Act two of this musical was all "dance." Performed by one man. The man happened to be her love interest that she sang about in act one. Through his dance, the audience gets to understand his perspective on what happened and how he was feeling! 

At the end of the musical, SONG and DANCE unite, meaning..... Bernadette Peters and her love interest reconcile on stage and realize that they made a mistake walking away from the other. 

I can't tell you how many people I introduced to Song and Dance and this morning's text message was a THANK YOU for bringing this musical to her attention over all these years! Below is one of the SONGS from Song and Dance. It highlights one of her break ups from act one, and she was singing about how she would prefer hearing the news!  Of course this song has a much more profound impact on me now. As I now know, first hand, all the relationship tragedies she highlights.

Frankly I am not sure this musical could be performed and appreciated by today's audiences. First off, it requires immense talent but second, audiences are used to sound effects, costumes, and scenery. But if you are looking for PURE human dynamics, emotions, and the struggles and pains HONESTLY faced in relationships.... then this your musical! 

Tell me on a Sunday:

Here's another great one.... an Unexpected Song (the actual song starts at 2:00):

Friday, May 30, 2025

Friday, May 30, 2025

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2006. Mattie was four years old! That day, myself and Mattie's preschool teacher attended a Taste of DC event. We were both foodies and literally we did a group tour with a handful of people and experienced a food specialty at each restaurant we visited. It was a special day. When I came home, Mattie was thrilled to show me the bicycle he and my husband bought and assembled. 

It was so wonderful to see Mattie smiling, happy, and eager to learn how to bicycle ride! I will NEVER forget this moment in time. Our commons area of our townhouse was the perfect place where Mattie learned to walk, run, fly a kite, ride a bicycle and even drive a ride-on vehicle!

Quote of the day: Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose. ~ Kevin Arnold

Today I happened to see an article entitled, If you can still remember these 10 things from your past, your mind is sharper than most in retirement. Naturally this caught my attention given my daily and personal encounters with dementia. I am constantly worried that I will have dementia as I age, and the pervasive question always is..... who is going to take care of me? I lost Mattie and now I lost my husband. In many ways, my husband was my institutional knowledge. He focused on certain things that were different from me, which was great, because then between the two of us we captured and remembered all the scenarios in our life. Now that he is gone, it is like I have had to say good-bye to 50% of my memories. The loss of one's history and memories is traumatic, and given that we have NO CONTACT with each other, it isn't like I can reach out and ask..... do you remember this? Or where was this photo taken? This brings me great sadness on top of of the daily sadness that absorbs me.

The article highlighted the ten things, that if we remember them, then our minds are active and sharp. They are:

1. The phone numbers you used to dial by heart
2. The exact lyrics to songs from your youth
3. The way certain people made you feel
4. The smell of places you haven’t been to in decades
5. How you learned certain life lessons (the hard way)
6. Specific moments from raising your kids (or being raised yourself)
7. Old recipes you used to make from memory
8. The layout of homes you haven’t visited in decades
9. What you used to daydream about as a child
10. The details of books you read decades ago

When you look at this list, what do you think? Can you remember all ten of these things? I think I am good with memories from numbers 2-9. Number 1 and number 10, forget it. But that said, I can remember the phone number of my parents home in California when I was a teenager and I can remember my mother in law's phone number (a number I learned when I was 19). How do I remember her number? Well here's the funny reason. When you listen to her answering machine, she basically says, you have reached....###-###-####! It is how she says it! She is a musician, so she says it in a way that is almost song like. So like the ABCs song you learn as a kid, I remember her phone number, because of the melody!

Overall however, I remember things, people, and places by HOW they make me feel! You would be surprised the details I can recall about experiences because of the feelings they evoked. But that said, that doesn't mean I remember the exact geographic location of places! Don't get me started with dates either. Geography and dates aren't my strong suit, but they were my husband's! I never worried about remembering these details, because I knew my other half had me covered. But now, I can look at photos of places we traveled and I have NO IDEA where we were and I also have NO IDEA about the year we did this travel! It is scary to me, because a divorce has ramifications that you may not have even considered. Yet this traumatic loss reverberates through every aspect of my life. 

The article asks us all to consider...........What’s one memory from your past that still surprises you with how clear it feels?

Seriously this question is right up my alley, because if you ask me about feelings, my mind is like a professional databank of emotions. It is like a steel trap, where no feeling is ever forgotten. So there is NOT just ONE MEMORY for me, but THOUSANDS! 

I could share countless memories about how I met my husband in college, our adventures and antics, life with Mattie, and our unforgettable life together. But instead, I am sharing several memories with you from my childhood. When I was growing up (I am talking 5-10 years old), practically every summer we visited Italy. At the time, we had a lot of family there from both sides. My mom discovered this amazing hotel in Sorrento, the Excelsior Vittoria. Naturally I could never forget it, as we share a name. Maybe it was its iconic location, its beauty, or a feeling of a simpler, happier, and better quality of life that Sorrento evokes! But here are a few memories:

• This hotel had a pool. They put flippers on my feet one day, and despite kicking as hard as I could, I was drowning. Fortunately the guard on duty, Matteo, saved me. I will never forget that feeling of being sucked below the water line and being unable to breathe.
• This hotel has beautiful and unforgettable gardens. Truly magical. My grandmother and myself were sitting on a bench in the garden one day, and I accidently spilled a bit of my soda on the ground. Within minutes, I was literally covered in ants. Neither of us could get over how the ants swarmed around me. 
• As a child, I shared a room with grandmother while staying at this hotel. At the time, there was a Contessa who frequently stayed there. As a kid, I was intrigued by her. She was an older woman and very elegant. When she swam in the pool, she always wore this adorable bonnet and cut through the water like a swan. During one of our stays at the hotel, she happened to have a room adjoining ours. Remember it was an OLD hotel, and the door between the rooms had a key hole. As a child, I would sit by the key hole, which gave me a view of the Contessa by her make up table. I used to love looking in and checking out her perfume bottles, beautiful hair brushes, and makeup. Naturally whenever my grandmother caught me, she would tell me to STOP it! But there was something magical or fairy book like at watching the Contessa.

Thursday, May 29, 2025

Thursday, May 29, 2025

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2005. Mattie was three years old. That day we took him to a beautiful garden in Maryland. The garden had this wonderful fountain and pond, and Mattie spotted fish in it. So he hopped up on the ledge to check it out. When I tell you there were many many adventures with Mattie Brown, I am not kidding you! He brought a whole new dimension to my life and though I was only a mom for seven years, I would not have traded those moments for anything. 

Quote of the day: Your greatest influence might come from the things that once broke you. ~ Jeff Brown

For the past several nights, Indie the cat, has been following me upstairs to my bedroom. She wants her own time and attention and literally is now spending four hours or so on the bed with me while I am sleeping. This is very unusual for her. Remember Indie wasn't really bonded with me. She was my husband's cat, while Sunny, was clearly my pooch. Any case, once my husband left, Indie quickly learned that she had to hitch her wagon to me. It has been a very interesting transition to experience. If you have any doubt that animals grieve, I can assure you they do! I saw it with Patches, our calico cat when Mattie died, and I saw it with JJ, my neighbor's Jack Russell terrier, who was depressed and wouldn't eat after Mattie's death. Animals are very sensitive creatures and they are deeply in tune to their humans ups and downs. 

When Mattie died, Patches spent hours sleeping on Mattie's pillows and bed each day. This was very unusual because, she never did this while he was alive. JJ the dog, would come visit me every afternoon. I would find him outside my front door, sitting on the stoop. When I would open the door, he would come inside and head immediately for Mattie's room. Keep in mind, he never did that before. One day, he left Mattie's room with a sandal in his mouth. He carried Mattie's sandal back to his home and his owner told me that JJ slept next to that sandal each night for months!

As for Indie, she has studied my patterns. After I finish my daily routine and sit on the couch at night to watch TV with my parents, Indie comes from wherever she is in the house, to sit on the arm of the couch, right next to me. She is looking to be petted and to have me close to her. I am so glad she is a part of my life, especially after losing Sunny and then my husband. 

This morning was another winner! As soon as I opened my eyes, I could see there were several emails I had to address immediately. One thing is clear, I have become a person who knew nothing about bill paying and cash flow, to now being fully informed and quite capable of balancing budgets and managing our whole household's finances. This week, I have had to advocate for myself on many fronts and this morning, I was able to get several issues resolved. However, while I felt good about that, it was short lived. Why? Because today, our pool was opened for the season. I was tempted not to open it at all, but I realize that would do greater damage to the pool. Any case, multiple things are wrong with it and I was presented with six major issues and estimates for each. Truly I was ready to jump out the window. But then I rationalized to myself, took a deep breath and began to figure out how I can balance all these expenses. 

Later in the morning, my dad's physical therapist arrived and while she arrived, I got a call from an out of state police department. They were calling me regarding a family member. I have to say at first I was very confused.... how did the police get my land line number, and even more surprising that I was the point of contact. Any case, though I may be in another state, I managed that issue as if I was next door! 

By the afternoon, to manage all my various stressors, I went to the backyard, with my clippers and greens barrel in tow. I did a ton of weeding and removed a dead rhododendron bush. Literally there is never an end to weeding in my backyard. But that is okay, it is my therapy. That said, I am keenly aware that I would prefer to stick to my daily structure, routine, and garden time, and altering from this pattern is anxiety provoking. I recall this feeling all too well, because when Mattie died, I was so traumatized that functioning was difficult. I landed up watching Hallmark movies and doing craft projects daily. That was my routine. The only reason I am so productive now, is because my parents rely on me, otherwise, I can see it would be easy to curl up in a ball and retreat. How I am feeling now is not as surprising at all to me because of the many lessons I learned about trauma and grief from Mattie's death. As I always say..... Mattie was my greatest teacher. 

Wednesday, May 28, 2025

Wednesday, May 28, 2025

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2008. Mattie was six years old and was almost finished with his kindergarten year! It was a big transition year for Mattie from preschool to kindergarten, but Mattie was thriving, learning, and made some wonderful friendships. A spring tradition for Mattie was collecting tent moth caterpillars. We had NONE in our neighborhood in DC, so where did he get them? Literally he would collect them in Alexandria, VA (at his school), bring them home in a cup, and we would start our daily care and countdown until they spun their cocoons and turned into moths! I snapped this photo because it was the special day Mattie was waiting for..... the releasing of moths. After Mattie died, many moths came by our deck. Naturally I always wondered..... were they Mattie's moths?

Quote of the day: Face your fears, not because you’re not afraid, but because you are. ~ Susan Jeffers

I did way too much today. By 6pm, as I started to cook dinner, I thought I was going to be very sick. My head was spinning and I felt very nauseous.... a migraine was coming on! I ran to my purse to get my anti-nausea meds and quickly took them and started drinking ginger ale. It helped enough so that I could continue to cook, serve, and clean up dinner. 

I am pulled in so many different directions each day and when I tell you I HATE going to the mailbox, I am NOT kidding. I got a letter from my health insurer today requesting information that I DID NOT have, such as my doctor's tax ID, CPT codes and the list went on! But here's the kicker, the insurer never specified what procedure or form of care they need documentation for.... so literally I had to call them and was on the phone with them for 40 minutes! They did not know that a letter was sent to me, nor did they know what information was being requested of me! Seriously I can't make up this CRAP! While on the 40 minute call, they hung up on me. They did eventually call me back and guess what the issue is about? If you guessed Prolia, you get a gold star! This saga continues. If I was only balancing my medical needs that would be stressful enough, but I manage both of my parents too. So some days, I can get lost in notes, paperwork, and reminders about following up on things! 

Dealing with insurers could be a full time job, and that is only a very small percentage of my time! Later in the day, one of the professional associations the Foundation works with wanted me to weigh in on several grant applications, grants that we personally fund. Therefore, I put other things on hold, in order to address this pressing matter. Any case, I am signing off for tonight, in hopes that I feel better tomorrow. I know that each day is filled with so many tasks and demands and the reality that I have no one to share them with is sometimes too much to take. 

Tuesday, May 27, 2025

Tuesday, May 27, 2025 -- Mattie died 796 weeks ago today.

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2004. Mattie was two years old. This ride-on fire engine was a gift from my mother in law to Mattie. Mattie LOVED anything with wheels. All modes of transportation fascinated him! What makes me chuckle with this photo is the simple reality...... Mattie wanted one hand on his fire engine and the other one was trying to reach for me! Though this was a ride-on vehicle, for the most part that was NOT how Mattie used it. He would transport toys on this fire engine and in the summer months, he loved to wash it outside with a hose. Mattie had a way of making the ordinary seem extraordinary. 

Quote of the day: You were given this mountain to show others it can be moved. ~ Mel Robbins

Some days I can carry on, as I get focused on the chores, tasks and activities I need to accomplish for the day. Then there are other days like today, where the reality of my traumatic loss hits me. Now that the Foundation Walk is behind me, and I completed most of the admin for it, I remember what my husband and I always did together Post-Walk! We would go on a week's vacation together to the beach. It was our way of trying to regroup and acknowledge what we accomplished together. I can't quite put into words the multiple feelings that hit me each day since he left and perhaps because it is getting warmer and I know people are making summer plans and traveling, that the reality of my situation becomes even more apparent. 

This photo was taken in June of 2021 in South Carolina. A place I thought I would see many more times in my lifetime with my husband. It is very hard coming to terms with the fact that our 35 years together only means something to me. My life has stopped, just like it did the day Mattie died. Naturally Mattie has been gone 16 years now, and I still function and I am part of society, but I am NOT the person I used to be prior to Mattie getting cancer. I would say the same applies now that I am divorced. That Vicki died, she died and she isn't coming back and I say this with confidence. Mattie's death was a different type of loss. There was no doubt even as Mattie breathed his last breath that HE LOVED ME. This can't be said for my husband, and yet I know our life together, I know the special bond we shared, and I also know him BETTER than anyone else in this world. Therefore, what has happened doesn't compute to me, and I consider myself a master assessor of people and situations. 

Given how I was feeling today, I jumped from one activity to the next. One of which was using a hedge trimmer and cutting back bushes. I did it while it was raining, but it did not matter. I needed to be outside and expending energy, otherwise the negative energy would be all consuming. Needless to say, I filled up an entire large greens container with debris. To me life has ended, I look forward to nothing, and I have no interest in traveling ever again. This is my current state of affairs, and I can only hope that this feeling of despair lightens up this week. 

Monday, May 26, 2025

Monday, May 26, 2025

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2006. Mattie was four years old, and that weekend, we transitioned Mattie from his crib/daybed to a real twin bed. This was a monumental event for Mattie and he was so excited to have picked out his Bob the Builder bed sheets! This bed frame was handmade by Mattie's great grandfather. These frames saw three generations of children: Mattie's paternal grandmother, Mattie's dad, and then of course Mattie. Look at that smile! He was so happy, as Mattie deemed himself a BIG BOY!

Quote of the day: It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God such men lived. ~ George S. Patton

A Memorial Day tradition for me and my husband was watching the National Memorial Day Concert on the Washington Capitol. Given that we used to live blocks from where this concert took place, it had even more significance for us. Now, I carry the tradition on alone. Last night I watched the Concert with my parents, and they loved it. The tributes were so beautiful and I appreciated hearing the stories of those who served or lost their lives. When I absorb the enormous sacrifices made by all these brave men and women, it makes me pause. I admire anyone who can commit to something greater than themselves. People who have convictions, principles, and a higher calling to ensure freedom and safety to our Nation and to those around the world. Even though I am very absorbed in my own day to day existence and heartbreak, I have not and will not lose sight of Memorial Day.   

Many of the featured stories last night touched my heart. If you did not see the concert, I want to introduce you to Colonel Otis Evans, an army pilot during the Vietnam War. Colonel Evans was part of the Army medevac crew, known by their radio call sign "Dustoff." They got this nickname because when the rotors of helicopters came close to the ground they would kick up dust. Dustoff flew nearly half a million missions, rescuing over 900,000 wounded under the most dangerous conditions. Dustoff pilots flew 24/7 and when they landed to pick up the wounded, they only were on the ground 15 minutes. Most likely for the helicopter's safety and for the timeliness of getting the injured to an Army hospital. Dustoff's motto is: “When I have your wounded.” Meaning that their job is NOT done, until all wounded are retrieved. 

I can not imagine the conditions these pilots worked under or the intense stress of knowing that at any moment, they too could lose their own lives during a rescue operation. Yet that did not stop them, they were focused, determined, and unstoppable. When we think of wars, we think of the actual fighting. But these Dustoffs were there to save lives, and understood that behind each soldier stood a family, who wanted to see their loved one return home. Therefore, these rescue missions were vital to achieving that goal. Colonel Otis' story touched my heart and when I should feel down or incapable of making it through a given day, I will reflect on his bravery and that of all the members of our armed forces who sacrifice their own lives for our existence. 

Other PBS Featured Stories! Check them out, they are a beautiful Memorial Day tributes, and to see the lives of wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, children, and siblings impacted by the death of a loved one, naturally hits close to home for me. Certainly the circumstances around their losses vary greatly from mine, yet, grief and loss are the great human unifiers. May the lives of those who served never be forgotten, as these losses must serve a purpose. 

Sunday, May 25, 2025

Sunday, May 25, 2025

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2006. Mattie was four years old and it was Memorial Day weekend. We took Mattie to Pennsylvania and visited Sesame Street Place, a theme park geared toward preschoolers. Anyone who is familiar with Sesame Street, recognizes this green door, featured in the long running TV show. Mattie posed in front of it with his Elmo balloons. Elmo was Mattie's favorite character. Mattie could be multitasking or even be in another room of our townhouse. If he heard Elmo on the TV, he literally would STOP what ever he was doing and was transfixed onto the TV. That was how much Mattie LOVED Elmo. While at the theme park, a life sized Elmo came up to Mattie. I thought Mattie was going to be frightened, instead.... he greeted Elmo and apparently made an impression on this Elmo, because the next thing I knew he handed Mattie an Elmo balloon... which was how Mattie landed up with two. I will never forget the beautiful Memorial Day parade at that park, honoring all branches of the military. Truthfully the whole crowd was sharing in the spirit of the day. 

Quote of the day: Don’t wait until the storm passes – anyone can do that. Learn to see what the storm came to teach you. ~ Pema Chödrön

Practically daily, Google sends me photo memories in my email inbox. Some days, I can open these emails and look at the memories and other days, I JUST CAN'T! I can't because I am afraid of what will be featured in the photos, such as content that highlights my life with my husband. It is very hard having a close bond with someone for 35 years, having a child together, going through childhood cancer together, losing Mattie, and then finding a way to re-engage with the world without our son. We have had quite a life together, filled with many challenges, but the one constant was..... US. Now the one constant that has been a part of my life all these years has gone. I am not sure this will ever be something I will accept. I am aware of it, but I do not understand it one iota, given our incredible bond. 

Any case, I did bravely open the emails this week and of course to no surprise, all of the photo memories highlight Mattie Miracle Walks. Makes sense to me, as the Walk is always the third Sunday in May. I truly can't believe that I have hosted 16 Awareness Walks. Where did the time go? I decided to share these ten photographic memories with you!   

Of course some of the photos are NOT Awareness Walk related, but nonetheless, all were taken on May 13th of different years. I would like to call attention to the photo in the lower left.... Mattie was sitting in a wheelchair with his physical therapist, Anna by his side. We took Mattie outside to the hospital rose garden for his session that day. Anna was encouraging Mattie to blow bubbles (for his lungs), but he just wasn't interested. She could sense an emotional low in Mattie, so she bent down to talk to him. I captured this tender moment, because what this photo told me was two things.... first Mattie, felt comfortable enough to confide in Anna, and Anna understood that though her role was to get Mattie moving, she knew that the emotional connection she had with Mattie was vital and needed to be nurtured in order to have an effective therapeutic bond. 

This cute girl you see in the swimming pool was Sammie. Sammie and her family lived on the West Coast, but we became connected by email, because both Mattie and Sammie were diagnosed with bone cancer. Sammie was further along in her cancer treatment than Mattie, but like Mattie was a live wire and a force. I will never forget the day when I learned Sammie was dying. She died before Mattie and to this day, I will never forget the bond I shared with her mom. 

The middle picture on the right features Tricia and her family. Tricia was Mattie's favorite nurse. Truthfully Tricia cared for all three of us and to this day, we remain very close. Tricia wasn't just an amazing nurse, she was a fierce advocate. She assisted me on multiple occasions. One incident at the hospital I will never forget. A PICU nurse was barring me from entering Mattie's hospital room. She accused me of being the problem, the reason why Mattie was demanding pain meds. This nurse even convinced Mattie's doctor that I was a problem! Meanwhile, Mattie was in his room screaming for me! I literally thought I was going to throttle both of them. Who stepped in? Tricia. Literally Tricia took on both this headstrong nurse and doctor. By the time she finished with them, they backed off because she let them know that the reason Mattie is emotionally stable at all was because of me and she would know this first hand because she spent MONTHS with me caring for Mattie. Way to go Tricia! 

Literally our Walks had all sorts of activities from rally races, Zumba dancing sessions, and walking around the track. The energy on the track was memorable. 

When I look back at the live Walks, I wonder.... how on earth did I do this?! The amount of work that went into this day is hard to describe! I was responsible for every attention to detail! Which meant getting permits from the city to host our event, as the Walk was open to the public. Coordinating the logistics of tents, tables, food vendors, other vendors who did child friendly activities (Legos, face painting, Retile Alive show, caricatures, etc!!!), a raffle, our DJ, our program and schedule of the day, posters created and displayed around the track featuring childhood cancer facts, stories, and our accomplishments, and seriously the list went on and on. It would take me months to organize this and then several months to put the Walk away and manage the administrative clean up. 

As our event got bigger, we hired a professional photographer to capture the energy of the day! I always loved his group photo of us before the cowbells rang for the start of the Walk! Why cowbells? Well I tried other sounds but they frightened the children. Cowbells were the only sound that everyone could tolerate! Until years later, we got a DJ, and he would kick off the start of the Walks with the song, Dancing Queen!

With each lap that people walked around the track, they would earn a bead. For example one year the word to spell out was LOVE. Therefore the first lap they earned a red bead, the second lap an L bead, third lap an O bead, fourth lap a V bead, fifth lap an E bead, and the sixth lap another red bead. Each participant was provided with a mini flashlight or carabiner clip and string.  

See the beads?

The LOVE bead station!

Do you see people sitting in the stands? That is because in the early years of our event, we had a formal program with a guest speaker! 

Notice the photo on the left, with kids sitting on the grass. They were watching and participating in a magic show. Since Mattie LOVED magic, his mentor, Bob, hosted a show in Mattie's honor at every live Walk!

We also had a robotics group attend our Walks and they brought the robots they designed to the event! YES even the robot did laps! 

You can see the orange spirit of our walkers. When we had a live event, each participant got a specially designed t-shirt for that year. I hosted ten live walks (2010-1019), so out and about in our community are ten different t-shirt designs. I love seeing our long time supporters continuing to wear our t-shirts even during our virtual Walks! 

These photos were taken at the Mattie March in 2009. This was an event Mattie's support community hosted for him, to show love and support for him and our family. Remember at that point in time, we thought Mattie was going to return to school that Fall (2009). Unfortunately Mattie died four months after this event. The Mattie March served as the template for the creation and launch of the first Mattie Miracle Walk in 2010!