Tonight's picture was taken in July of 2007. Mattie was five years old. That week, we took Mattie to Boston to visit my in-laws. It was in their garden that Mattie was introduced to chipmunks. He absolutely loved them and nicknamed one, "Chippy." In fact, when Mattie entered kindergarten the children were engaged in a "writer's workshop," where they would pick a topic of their choosing and try to form sentences on paper. The teacher even encouraged the children to bring in a photo of what they were writing about. Sure enough, Mattie's first story was about "Chippy" the chipmunk! Of course all chipmunks I see now remind me of this sweet encounter with Chippy!
Quote of the day: The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keep out the joy. ~ Jim Rohn
When I saw this quote tonight, I sincerely laughed. I laughed because walls are built up to protect ourselves and I frankly think if we are meant to find joy (if it even exists), then it will happen, walls or no walls.
I literally got into bed last night and fell asleep within minutes. I am that exhausted from two nights in the ER and getting my dad admitted to the hospital. Of course, Indie woke me up at 6:30am wanting breakfast. But right after I fed her, I returned to bed. I got up at 8am, and felt a little more normal, but I am chronically exhausted and every muscle aches.
This morning, I was able to manage the laundry, cleaning up around the house, packing things for the hospital, calling my dad's nurse and getting a status report, and then I took my mom to the hospital to visit my dad. When I entered his room, he was sleeping. I am always in clean up mode, so I literally cleaned up debris all over the room, on his bed, and then turned my attention to my dad and his hygiene. His nurses never removed the undershirt and pajama top he came to the hospital in on Friday. Given that my dad looked and smelled like a mess, I worked hard at removing these items of clothing and then gave him a sponge bath, brushed his teeth, and shaved him. He looked a lot better after I finished with him. His nurse was a man today. When he came into the room and saw me doing all this work, he seemed shocked. Not sure what he is shocked about, as I am doing what any family caregiver does each and every day! But given the health care system's reaction to my tasks, it gives me the insight that they see many people who do not have family member attention.
What I also determined was the nursing staff were not giving my dad Tylenol and cough meds around the clock. The orders were given as needed. I explained to the nursing staff ONCE again that my dad is not competent enough to know what he needs, so I had them change the orders to every 4-6 hours. Truthfully what happens in the hospital if you don't have an advocate?
I think my overall concern is that I do not see my dad getting better. He is still congested, has no energy, sleeps the day away, and now to add insult to injury has a severe back injury. It makes it hard to clean him, feed him, and even move pillows from his head. He is more fragile than ever. Of course over the weekend, physical therapists do not work, which means that my dad will be spending days in bed! Each day that he spends in bed is like weeks for you and me. It isn't good for his lungs and it most definitely depletes whatever physical strength he may have. So naturally I am growing more concerned because when Monday comes, I know they are going to be focused on discharge, but to me, my dad is leaving the hospital in a worse state than when I brought him to it on Wednesday, July 9.
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