Tuesday, October 15, 2019

Tuesday, October 15, 2019 -- Mattie died 524 weeks ago today. 

Tonight's picture was taken in November of 2002. Mattie was seven months old and adjusting to being in the tub. I can't say that Mattie loved water or bath time in the beginning. However, as he got older, he could spend hours playing in the water if I let him!



Quote of the day: Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. ~ Søren Kierkegaard

This is my friend Margy. She is my first Facebook friend that I made, who I did not actually know in person. We had mutual friends, as Margy was once a play therapist, and she supported many of the parents we know who had children with cancer. 

I have known Margy for five years. In January of 2018, she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. As she tells women all the time..... you can get ovarian cancer even when your ovaries have been removed. It doesn't sound logical, but it is the reality. Which is why ovarian cancer is called the silent killer, because by the time women seek help, cancer has typically metastasized. 

Before heading to the hospital, I went to buy Margy a balloon. While talking to the lady in the flower shop who sold me the balloon, I learned that this woman's daughter (college aged) died from cancer. Naturally she and I got to talking, and she told me the one thing she can't stand is when people tell her..... with time she will get over it! We got each other immediately. 

I spent several hours with Margy and her husband today. It was my very first visit to Fairfax INOVA, a local hospital. All I can say is the facility is remarkable and every person I met was delightful. A big difference from the environment where Mattie was treated! I met a fantastic pulmonologist today, who literally came into Margy's room and performed a thoracentesis in front of me. A thoracentesis is a procedure in which a needle is inserted into the pleural space between the lungs and the chest wall. This procedure is done to remove excess fluid, to help you breathe easier. The doctor was competent, kind, and had a great bedside manner. Which helps when you know a big needle/catheter is going between your ribs to your lungs. 

My friend Margy has an amazing attitude and truly is inspirational, given all she is facing treatment wise. Of course, I can't be in a hospital and dealing with a cancer issue without reflecting on my life with Mattie. Everything about Margy's room was SO DIFFERENT from what we experienced with Mattie. Margy had closets, drawers to store things, a private bathroom and even a safe. Nothing like Mattie's room. I still can't believe we had NO closets and we shared showers with the neighboring room for 14 months! I also laughed with Margy today, because when Mattie was hospitalized, there were no safes in his hospital rooms. I literally had my purse out in the open and I can attest to the fact that in 14 months, no one ever stole a thing from my purse. Not even a tissue! I did not think about it back then, but that speaks to how I was feeling.... that I was living in my second home. I trusted my environment, not only with my purse, but with my son. 

When I left Margy tonight, look who was following me home.... Mattie Moon. It was the biggest moon ever. 

Meanwhile, Peter went to the historic Nat's game tonight with our friend Jeff. Jeff is Charlotte's dad. Mattie and Charlotte always told me that they were going to get married and that they also were going to be college roommates. 

So happy Peter could see this game tonight and can see the Nat's go to the World Series.