Tuesday, January 1, 2019

Tuesday, January 1, 2019 --- Mattie died 485 weeks ago today. 

Tonight's picture was taken in December of 2002. It was Mattie's first Christmas, and though he did not understand the significance of the holiday, we decorated and started to create our own traditions. Peter and I used to love to decorate for the holidays, as Peter was always determined to find the perfectly shaped tree. The smell of pine within our home was noteworthy as were the decorations we put on the tree. Even back then, I had an ornament for family members who had died. They may have died but they were always be a part of our holidays. As Mattie got older, he joined us in the decorating tradition. In fact, each year, the day after Thanksgiving, Peter and Mattie created an outdoor light display in our commons area. For years, our neighbors told me how much they appreciated our efforts. Apparently our lights brought them happiness on the dark days of winter. 


Quote of the day: Each year's regret are envelopes in which messages of hope are found for the new year. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson


We are starting the New Year, with a new child life professional at Children's Hospital at Sinai. This is Adina, the first Mattie Miracle child life professional to work at Sinai. Adina wrote to me over the holidays to introduce herself to me and to also highlight some of the things she has done so far. She wanted me to know that our snack and item cart is a big hit at the hospital. 

Here is what Adina told me today.........

I had one little girl who waited all day for the snack cart and when I came to her room she had a big bag ready to stock up on treats. She had not been feeling well all day but she lit up when she saw the cart.


A family from overseas was especially touched by the cart. They were in disbelief that it was all free and were so excited to try American candy. The father was insistent on making a donation to the cart. They were in the hospital for a few days and this really brightened their time here.


I must say receiving Adina's message  brightened my day. It did because I am still congested and not feeling great. In addition, the New Year doesn't have the same meaning to me as it once did. This is not a Vicki thing, and it isn't only associated with parents who lost a child to cancer. Rather there are many of us out there who have experienced one thing or another in our lives that make holidays challenging to acknowledge, much less celebrate. To all of us feeling this way, may we find the hope and courage to greet and endure 2019.