Tonight's picture was taken on July 4 of 2003. Mattie was 15 months old and it was his first time visiting North Carolina and the beach. He was very cautious and suspect of the Atlantic Ocean! Mattie's hands were like little radar scopes. When he made a fist, that was my sign that he wasn't ready to explore and take in his surroundings. If the hand was open and the fingers fanning, that meant Mattie wanted to engage and learn more. The many wonderful signs of Mattie. This photo is still priceless to me.
Quote of the day: Today's coronavirus update from Johns Hopkins.
- number of people diagnosed with the virus: 2,836,113
- number of people who died from the virus: 129,654
I got up this morning at 6:45am. That is the latest I have gotten up in a month. My thinking was that no caregivers or therapists were coming today, so I did not have to have everything ready by 8am. My hope was for a more stress free day! What a joke.
I got up, made the bed, showered and dressed. Then I went downstairs to start making breakfast for my parents. After which, I went upstairs and woke my dad up and began the morning process.... picking out clothes, getting him up, showered, dressed, and to help him downstairs. My mom is trying to learn the morning routine I have with my dad, and of course any time I train someone the process takes twice as long than if I did it myself.
As we were helping my dad down the steps this morning, he swayed forward and became imbalanced. I have not seen this happen before in the entire month I have been here. But what I do know is he would have fallen if I did not catch and prop him up. I can't explain why he was off balance and of course he has no insight on the process. Therefore, it adds to my concerns. As I can handle my dad physically, but my mom can't.
While my parents were having breakfast. I went back upstairs to strip their bedding to launder it and collected all my dad's towels from showering. After which, I sat down to eat breakfast. Peter ran chores and at breakfast, my dad wanted to know if anyone was coming today..... meaning caregivers or therapists. When I said 'no,' I qualified it by saying 'they may not be coming, but that doesn't mean there will be no routine or exercises.' The notion of exercising sent him over the edge and he got hostile with us. I don't mean just hostile, I would say rude, cursing, and got up from the table, leaped for his walker and stormed out of the room. All dangerous as he could have fallen in the process. There was no reasoning with him. Despite our best efforts to explain the importance of movement and exercise, he deems our requests as us "torturing" him.
It is hard enough managing daily caregiver needs, but it is ten times harder when the person you know is no longer the same person. It is emotionally draining and this would be hard to manage if we were living in the same town, but it is next to impossible being 2,500 miles away. As I leave my parents on Tuesday to return home, I feel like I am watching a train wreck in slow motion. The train is going to derail, it is just a matter of how soon. I will return again this summer, but there are things I must do at home, and poor Sunny and Indie, left without us for a month.
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