A Remembrance Video of Mattie

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to me that you take the time to write and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful and help support me through very challenging times. I am forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically have stopped writing on September 9, 2010. However, like my journey with grief there is so much that still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with me, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.


As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki



October 22, 2020

Thursday, October 22, 2020

Thursday, October 22, 2020

Tonight's picture was taken in October of 2008. Mattie was in the outpatient clinic of the hospital. Next to him was his haunted house. Mattie constructed it out of a cardboard box. The box remained in the clinic and each week, Mattie would work on it and add to it. As you can see there were ghosts attached to the house, but in Mattie's hand was a witch that he created with his art therapists. By the time this haunted house was done, it was an incredible piece of art. As the inside and the outside were equally spooky!




Quote of the day: Today's coronavirus update from Johns Hopkins.

  • number of people diagnosed with the virus: 8,398,267
  • number of people who died from the virus: 222,940


What's with the teacups? Good question! It relates to my dream last night. They say people are dreaming more than ever due to COVID. I am not sure that is exactly true for me, other than I find I am actually remembering my dreams more often now. 

Last night, I was dreaming of tea cups. I mean a lot of tea cups. Apparently I was living in a house. One that I did not recognize. In fact, I did not recognize the surroundings at all. Yet in this unrecognizable house, I was hosting a tea party. I invited people. But who showed up were people from every avenue of my life. It was like a walk down memory lane from people I knew as a child to now as an adult. However, what was notable in my dream was more people showed up than I had planned and I was desperately searching the house for more cups to serve my guests. At one point, I went outside the house and asked Peter to help me look in cabinets and bins that sat in our driveway. I can recall opening cabinet after cabinet, bin after bin. Instead of finding junk or extraneous items in these storage places, ALL I found were cups. They were the only thing I had stored. To my amazement, I had a tea cup with every pattern and shape possible. It surprised me in my dream, as I had no idea where these cups came from. It was like winning the lottery, except I did not buy a ticket, nor was I winning money. My bounty was in cups. Not to mention friends who showed up. 

If I looked up dreams involving china or porcelain, what I discovered is this could mean that "positive changes are afoot." Well that is most welcomed considering the various stressors we are living under. In addition to the usual stressors, I think the daily routine and social isolation are getting to me. So in a way, if I find no meaning in all the cups (other than maybe I want to hold a tea party!), I definitely do with all the friends who showed up in my dream. It is a reminder that even when we feel the lowest, we really are never alone.

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