Monday, August 30, 2021

Monday, August 30, 2021

Tonight's picture was taken in March of 2003. Mattie was 11 months old and it was his first plane trip to Los Angeles. Mattie visited with my parents and truly enjoyed the backyard and being about to be outside and be one with nature. 

Quote of the day: Today's coronavirus update from Johns Hopkins. 

• Number of people diagnosed with the virus: 39,048,608
• Number of people who died from the virus: 638,671

I was up at 6am because it was going to be another full day with the plumber and HVAC folks. Our driveway is like an ad for FH Furr. It has been this way since June. Three months of non-stop work! Literally the workmen left at 6pm. That is 10 hours of work today. They are all wonderful and professional, but it is very hard to unpack when I can't easily get around the house. I find this very frustrating and stressful. I am also cleaning around the clock and the whole thing is getting tiring. 

Sunny and Indie were not thrilled to have all this work done at the house today. In between managing calls about the house and workmen, I went through paperwork in my office. I found a lot pertaining to my dissertation. I kept a letter from my dissertation chair. She wrote:

Vicki, I thought that you (or your parents) might like having a copy of the words I spoke in honoring you at the Doctoral Tea. 

Here are the words my dissertation chair shared at the tea, which was a graduate school specific event acknowledging doctoral students. Carol wrote,

Vicki Sardi was a stellar student throughout her doctoral program. She was always an active contributor to class, an exceptional addition to course projects, and she wrote outstanding papers. In fact, I always saved her course paper to read last in the group -- for two reasons. First, they were always superior, and second, her papers settled me into a good mood as I prepared to submit final grades.

While here Vicki received the GWU Bender Teaching Award for her superb teaching as an adjunct faculty member. She also received the ACA Multicultural Award, a Chi Sigma Iota Award, and about six other awards. 

Vicki came to us from the sciences and her work reflects the attention to detail and objectivity that are never far from a scientist's approach. But she did not have an easy time with advisors, having two who left the university and having then to settle with me. I'll never forget Vicki making me promise to stay well, to avoid risking activities, and to not even think about retiring. Sure, I agreed that I wouldn't take up sky-diving and promised not to retire. But I drew the limits at avoiding skiing!

Vicki's dissertation is a tour de force. In Erik Erikson's terms, she studied generativity, in this case, how organizations support those who care for elderly family members. It was not easy finding an organization or agency that offers eldercare services but she persisted --- in fact, she persisted to the extent that the federal agency she eventually did use -- came after her with an offer of full time employment. 

Vicki's doctoral study, and her need to show the support that employed caregivers need when caring for elderly loved ones, were in memory of her grandmother who had spent her last years needing full time eldercare services and of her parents who gave of themselves in her grandmother's care. Her grandmother and parents live on in Vicki's study and in the dedication to her dissertation that speaks miles about Vicki as a person. It reads, " in memory of my maternal grandmother, Anne Spallone, who showed my family how to age with grace, beauty, and dignity, and to my loving parents, Virginia and Mauro Sardi, who taught me the value, honor, and importance of compassion as caregivers. 

The announcement of my dissertation defense (which is like an oral presentation, followed by questioning by your research committee). I remember by the time I got to defense day, I was relatively calm. I felt like no one knew my study as well as I did. I was proud of my work and truly my dissertation chair was correct.... it was a tour du force, because it took me about THREE years to find my study sample. I really think most students would have given up or changed the nature of their study. But I was focused and committed to studying the stresses of family caregivers who balanced work and caring for a sick older adult. 

I remember Peter snapped several photos of me and friends at graduation. On the left is my friend Lisa. Though Lisa and I haven't lived in the same state for decades, we remain connected and I am honored that she remains a steadfast blog reader. She is a gifted educator and I always appreciate how she reminds me that I do use my counseling skills each and every day with the Foundation. Ironically though I can recall the other two women in the photo!

Me popping my head up in the crowd. 

Me and Mattie with my dissertation chair, Carol. 

Me with Carol, dressed up in our doctoral caps and gowns. 

Onto the house. We had all our air ducts cleaned out today. The HVAC folks were here for 6 hours. They said they NEVER saw ducts this dirty! We asked if this dirt could have been from our painting, plastering, and refinishing floors. They said NO! Certainly it contributed to the mess, but they feel these ducts haven't been cleaned for the life of the house (26 years). The dirt, dust, and dry wall material looked like white frosting.

The ducts are now clean, and this is what a clean duct looks like. 

Having workmen under foot is difficult for all four of us! Tonight when everyone left, we all settled in the family room to unwind!