Friday, March 24, 2023

Friday, March 24, 2023

Tonight's picture was taken in March of 2007. That spring break, we took Mattie to Florida. Specifically to Key West to vacation with Peter's parents. On the long drive from Miami down to the Keys, we stopped at a shop called Shell World. It seemed to be full of whimsy and trinkets. Which was right up Mattie's alley! As you can see, Mattie sat on a 'hand' chair and gave me a big smile.

Quote of the day: If your heart is broken, make art with the pieces. ~ Shane Koyczan

I woke up at 5:30am this morning because if I didn't there would be no way for me to get my dad ready and to his memory care program, and my mom out the door to head to her physical therapy appointment. It was a sheer juggling act because Blanca (my long time house cleaner) came at 8:30am. Which means that my dad had to be up, washed, and dressed before she came. Of course I also had to factor in feeding Sunny and giving him chemo. Though 5:30 is not my hour, it is what I needed to do to get this house moving and functioning. 

Peter told me today, after looking at last night's nanny camera, that my dad got up at 4:30am and sat on the toilet bowl for an entire hour. None of this surprises me, but it does clearly illustrate the issues I have been observing. My dad has no idea of time and truly can't track anything for more than 30 seconds. After which, he is a complete blank slate. I am glad Peter looks at the camera each day for me, because I just can't! 

This was my mom's second physical therapy session today, after a three week hiatus because she was sick. I find that these sessions are wiping her out this week. Today she was working on steps in the session, as I find my mom struggles going up and down our step into our family room. She struggles because there is nothing to hold onto! Peter and I bought her a rock steady cane (pictured here), which we leave by the step to help her grip onto something when she goes up and down. 

Despite our best efforts, she complains that this isn't working. So the therapist suggested she use a quad cane and leave it by the step. She practiced with it in clinic today. Ironically this is what a quad cane looks like. Do you think that looks more sturdy than what we bought? I don't really see a big difference, so before getting another piece of equipment in my arsenal, I am going to attach velcro ankle weights to the rock steady cane and see if that helps to weigh it down and keep it from jiggling when my mom holds it. Honestly, I have to be problem solver extraordinaire too. 

Meanwhile, at 2pm, I picked my dad up from his memory program. As soon as he got into the car, I immediately asked him.... what were you doing in the classroom right before you came to the car? My dad had NO clue! Within that one minute walk, he lost whatever content he had in his head! In fact, I can read him the day's agenda at the center, and even those prompts do not jog his memory. His situation is quite noteworthy. 

On an aside, my mom's therapist asked us today.... what are you doing this weekend? It is a fair and appropriate question, but how do I explain to a young and vibrant woman what my daily life looks like? There is no way I can even attempt to schedule to do something with my parents. Neither have the energy, my dad doesn't have the interest, and just trying to get them out to door to a restaurant can feel like I am climbing Mt. Everest. My world and daily routine centers on tasks, more tasks, and then more after that! It is hard to describe this reality to someone who isn't a full-time caregiver. The therapist helps people every day, but it is one thing to help a patient for 45 minutes to an hour, and quite another to be responsible for two people 24/7.