Tonight's picture was taken in July of 2006. Mattie was four years old and that day he was invited to his preschool friend, Kate's birthday party. Now looking back at this photo, I can say with confidence that I know over 50% of the kids in this photo and still keep in contact with their parents. Mattie's preschool was a special place and it was in that school, that I made many strong connections. I suspect it was because of the developmental stage we were all in.... parenting young children, which is not for the meek. Mattie enjoyed his afternoon at Build a Bear and running around with his preschool friends. A day I won't forget.
Quote of the day: The sun himself is weak when he first rises, and gathers strength and courage as the day gets on. ~ Charles Dickens
My dad was home with us all day. I did my usual morning routine and then at 10:30am, I jumped on a conference call. Mattie Miracle got funded in 2021, after winning a grant from Shark Tank, to start a therapy support program. This program awards children, teens, and young adults with childhood cancer money to seek mental therapy support within their community. We have a formal application and some requirements have to be met. We also award funds either directly to mental health providers, or reimburse families once they submit a paid therapy bill. To make a long story short, we are supporting two families now and today's call was about working with a third family. Our grants are open to anyone in the United States. Our current awardees are not located in our National Capital Region.
When I jump on a conference call, I try to block out all the chaos in my life. My goal is to listen to the person I am speaking with and to try to help. Honestly I am proud of myself that I can still do this. While talking with this parent, what came to my mind was that these mental health issues have become a pattern and they have been around long term. Meaning they occurred even before a cancer diagnosis occurred. I couldn't help but put my clinical hat on and in the process, I think I provided this caring mom with another way of looking at the issues. So when I doubt I am using my degree, that my license is useless, I pause, and say ABSOLUTELY NOT! I wouldn't be able to have insights about certain issues without my education, training, and clinical skills. As I always used to tell my students..... when you get a degree and license, think creatively. There are all sorts of ways to use your skills and talents, and you just need to follow your passion and interests.
Of course I never thought my life was going to turn out the way it did. If you would have told me in my twenties that I was going to have a child with cancer, and who would die, I wouldn't believe it! Frankly back then I did not even know children got cancer. What a place of bliss I was once living in, but the fuzz is now off the peach. No matter how stressed and over worked I am, Mattie Miracle is NEVER far from my mind and keeping Mattie's legacy alive is my number one job in life.
I am proud to say that today was DAY TWO of my walking routine. After a full morning and afternoon with my parents, I went out at 4pm and walked until 5:15pm. Four miles later, I came back with a clearer head, calmer, more patience, and less anxiety. I am hoping I can continue this routine and carve this hour or so out for myself daily, because what I learned this week is that I NEED IT!
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