A Remembrance Video of Mattie

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to me that you take the time to write and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful and help support me through very challenging times. I am forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically have stopped writing on September 9, 2010. However, like my journey with grief there is so much that still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with me, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.


As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki



March 8, 2024

Friday, March 8, 2024

Friday, March 8, 2024

Tonight's picture was taken in March of 2009. Mattie was home between hospital admissions and that day my college buddy, Dave, sent Mattie this 3-D puzzle of sea creatures. This was our first 3-D puzzle we ever did and Mattie absolutely loved it. Mattie gravitated to puzzles at an early age and I can't tell you how many we did together over the years. I can't tell you how much every gift and item sent to Mattie over his entire cancer journey meant to us. Some days, a gift was the only bit of happiness we could provide Mattie. It wasn't just the tangible gift itself, but it was the intangible outcome of the gift that is most memorable to me. Because these gifts provided diversions, moments where we could just be ourselves.... not a family dealing with childhood cancer, and of course these gifts reminded us that we had a whole community behind us. 


Quote of the day: If there is a heaven, it’s certain our animals are to be there. Their lives become so interwoven with our own, it would take more than an archangel to detangle them. ~ Pam Brown


Based on Sunny's shape, I can tell this was probably the first winter we had together. That day we walked down to the National Mall and took Sunny on a snowy adventure. I can't tell you how many times we walked this Mall during COVID and over the years. It was our city backyard! 














I was sent this photo today by text message. There is a national conference going on in New Mexico. This is a conference we used to attend all the time prior to COVID and before taking on my role as a caregiver. In fact when I think about my former life, it seems like a lifetime ago. My life has changed dramatically and definitely not for the better. I truly never thought after Mattie died, that things could get much worse. I have learned that they can and they do. 

In any case, through Mattie Miracle, I have gotten to know many of the leaders of psychosocial care in the country. Which is how I received this photo today. Lori wanted me to know she was thinking of me and that Mattie Miracle is very present at the conference. This slide was presented by a medical doctor out of Pittsburgh. I have never met this doctor, and yet look who's up on the screen.... Mattie and Mattie Miracle. When Lori sent this to me, she basically said that the Psychosocial Standards of Care have such a huge range of interest around the country and they represent the beauty of Mattie and my vision. 

I can't tell you how much this photo and Lori's commentary meant to me today. I will cling to it because despite how I am feeling emotionally, I can never forget the impact that Mattie Miracle has and continues to make in the world. No matter how down and out I may be, Mattie and his legacy will always be number one in my life. Mattie serves as the guiding light and my compass on how I lead and manage his Foundation always and forever. 

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