A Remembrance Video of Mattie

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to me that you take the time to write and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful and help support me through very challenging times. I am forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically have stopped writing on September 9, 2010. However, like my journey with grief there is so much that still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with me, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.


As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki



July 30, 2024

Tuesday, July 30, 2024

Tuesday, July 30, 2024 -Mattie died 774 weeks ago today. 

Tonight's picture was taken in July of 2007. Mattie was five years old and that week we took him to Boston to visit my in-laws. Mattie's cousins came over to visit and they decided to take out this sunfish boat that was kept in the shed. The kids decided to wash it and play in and around it. Of course this was right up Mattie's alley because he was enamored with boats. Mattie's wish was to one day own a real boat of his own, which was why I always called him Captain Mattie. 


Quote of the day: The shattering of a heart when being broken is the loudest quiet ever. ~ Carroll Bryant


Every morning, the first thing I do is make the bed, then open the door to find Indie greeting me. Naturally she wants food immediately. After managing Indie, I make tea. This morning's tea came from Cheryl (who is a major support to me), and what I love about the tea is it's name... Mrs. Hughes. Any Downton Abbey fan will know the significance of this name! Having been a Downton Abbey fan for years, this tea brought me a moment of happiness while getting myself ready for the day. 

I have my tea each day in this large mug. The mug came from Curacao and Peter bought it for me during one of our cruises. Dushi is a Papiamento word that means "sweetheart."
This photo popped up in my in-box today! Rather ironic given the tea I was drinking this morning. On this day in 2019, while in Boston, we went with Peter's parents to the Downton Abbey exhibit. It was a special event for me given my connection to this show. 

It is hard to believe that this photo wasn't taken that long ago, and yet my life looked thoroughly different. If anyone would have told me that four years later Peter was going to leave me, I would have laughed. Laughed because it is STILL too ridiculous to believe.
No day is ever calm for me. On Sunday, we went out to brunch and sat outside. Something I rarely do, mainly because my parents don't like it and my dad gets easily bitten by bugs. On Sunday, while finishing up dessert, my dad was touching his left upper lip. It appeared like there was a red mark on it. Immediately his lip started to swell. While at the restaurant, I put ice on his lip. That seemed to help. But today, a huge hive formed and the whole left side of his face was beginning to swell. A typical but scary reaction.

My dad's doctor is away on vacation, so I called the on-call doctor. I spoke to her office staff and it took her over four hours to respond. I was LESS than thrilled with her. While waiting for her, I did text message my dad's doctor and even though he is out of the country, he called in a steroid. So I started my dad on this medication, and I am hoping that things improve quickly as he is scratching the area and seems even more out of it than usual. 

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