Tuesday, September 22, 2020

Tuesday, September 22, 2020 -- Mattie died 573 weeks ago today. 

Tonight's picture was taken in September of 2005. Mattie was three years old and that day we took him peach picking. It was our first and last time we ever did this. We had a very good time that day and brought home plenty of peaches. A fruit we all loved. Back then we thought we would have  future adventures to the farm. Unfortunately life got in the way and then Mattie was diagnosed with cancer. I distinctly remember I did a lot of cooking and baking with peaches that summer. I even learned how to make jam and jar it. 

Quote of the day: Today's coronavirus update from Johns Hopkins. 

• number of people diagnosed with the virus: 6,882,969
• number of people who died from the virus: 200,477

My gynecological saga began on February 2, 2012 (three years after Mattie's death). Back then, I went to the hospital to have a pelvic cat scan, ordered by my urologist. The results indicated that my bladder was fine, but the scan revealed information I wasn't expecting! In that I had several masses along my cervix. In fact, the radiologist was so bold to say that they looked like adenoma malignum. A rare form of cancer. Needless to say, that pronouncement sent me spinning. Spinning for over a year to be specific. I consulted with several gyn-oncologists, because NONE of them agreed with the other on my course of treatment. Two of them said my masses were in a location that made it impossible to biopsy and another one said, that he could easily biopsy them. He in fact was wrong! My journey involved having to select ONE doctor (out of several I consulted with). This wasn't an easy decision, but I selected a doctor because I trusted her, and felt that she was making the right medical decision. This doctor instinctually felt that I did not have cancer and instead of moving to a full hysterectomy (as all the other doctors recommended), she said, do scanning once a month. If there were any changes what so ever from one month to the other, then we'd know that surgery was necessary. This was a risky decision on my behalf, but I felt this doctor was an expert in her field, what she was saying to me made sense, and she had a plan to monitor me. 

Fortunately I selected that doctor. As she was correct about my masses. They were not cancerous, as I was scanned for over a year. Needless to say, I was an emotional wreck during each scan day. All I could reflect upon was our journey with Mattie and I was afraid, like Mattie, I also had a rare disease. You can only imagine how Peter must have felt during that time period. I honestly thought I was going to die.

After going through this experience with my gyn-oncologist, we have remained in contact. I have referred friends to her and to this day, she still prescribes scans for me every couple of years when I report signs or symptoms that are unexplainable. 

Tomorrow, I am heading to Baltimore, for a hysteroscopy with my gyn-oncologist. Hysteroscopy is used to diagnose or treat problems of the uterus, it is one of the most common uses to find the cause of abnormal uterine bleeding. Given my history with this doctor, if I report anything out of the ordinary, she takes it seriously. So she has counseled me to do this exploratory procedure. Mind you I am expecting her to find nothing, but I believe in being proactive. Life has showed me why that is important. 

So we head to Baltimore at 4:30am, in order to get to the hospital by 5:30am (the time requested for check in). That's quite a time! To me no one functions well at 5:30am. I only hope my doctor does. 

If it is a weekday, we are most likely walking Sunny on Roosevelt Island. We came across a woolly bear caterpillar. They are often found in the autumn after they have left their food plants (variety of grasses and weeds) in search of a dark and sheltered spot where they can hibernate for the winter. Each fuzzy caterpillar becomes an Isabella Tiger Moth.

Mattie loved woolly bears!

While walking, Peter stopped me in my tracks. I did not see this deer, but he did! Apparently he saw her shiny eyes from the bushes. 

It was a Ranger Rick kind of day on the Island. We saw so many creatures! Including immature wild turkeys. In reality Sunny sensed something in the bushes. So I stopped. Peering back at me was a beady eye. I honestly wasn't sure what I was looking at until I saw the rest of the body!

A wonderful great blue heron flew into a tree near us! It is hard to believe that a tree limb can manage that bird's big body. 

One of Sunny's favorites... a blue-tailed skink. 

My favorite stop on today's journey. I was within feet of this deer. To me deer are beautiful, innocent, and graceful. When on the Island, it is a reminder that the world does revolve around us and it survives quite well without politics, bitterness and hatred between people. Walking on the Island is my escape from the chaos of our daily lives.