Tonight's picture was taken in March of 2003. Mattie was 11 months old and visiting my parents for the first time in Los Angeles. My parent's neighbor lent us her wooden high chair. Typically Mattie wasn't into high chairs, but he entertained the notion for a short time, as he ate by the table when we ate. Unlike me, food did not mean that much to Mattie. In fact, I usually had to do a song and dance, or a lot of fun activities to get him to eat anything.
Quote of the day: Courage isn’t having the strength to go on, it is going on when you don’t have the strength. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte
I got up at 7am today because I knew if I wasn't up early, I wouldn't be able to accomplish the things I needed to do. When you are a caregiver, forget about your own schedule. Your schedule is totally dictated by those around you. This can be very very frustrating because I truly believe the human spirit needs freedom and independence in order to feel alive and thriving.
After I got myself showered and dressed, I went down stairs and set up breakfast for everyone. Then I went back upstairs and got my dad up. Before his hospitalization, he was able to get up on his own and start the grooming process such as shaving and brushing his teeth. Unfortunately each hospitalization is a cognitive set back, which strips away one more layer of independence. Now my dad needs instruction to get up, and basically what to do next. He appears to be lost without this guidance. So I sat while I talked him through brushing his teeth and shaving. Then helped him into the shower. Thankfully he can still shower himself, but the shower is a juggling act as I have both a shower chair and walker in there with him.
Once my dad is out of the shower, this is where he needs 100% of my help. Help with toweling off, putting on powder and lotions, getting dressed, brushing his hair, putting in eye drops and so forth. While my dad is in the shower, I am making the bed and compiling trash accumulated from the night before. For most people, after doing this, they would feel like they put in a FULL day. But that is only the start of my day. Once I get my dad dressed, I have to help him down the stairs. Which means that I put a gait belt around his waste and guide him down each step. When we make it to the first floor, I help him to the breakfast table. He eats independently but does need supervision as he eats way too fast and this can cause choking. Needless to say by the time I sit down for breakfast, he is already done and waiting for me to give him his next instruction. I feel constant pressure.
After breakfast, I clean up, and then move onto brain games. This entails everything from reading comprehension passages, numbrix, word finds, and other puzzles. Once that is done, I then time my dad and make him (and I mean MAKE HIM) walk five minutes around the first floor. If I don't require him to move, he won't! My mom calls him a "potted plant." If left to his own devises he would sleep in a chair the entire day. It is a very sad commentary.
This morning after his routine, I ran out to the grocery store. Who knew the grocery store could be a form of respite. But it is! I got everything, came home and put things away. Then I got my mom in the car and we went to two open houses. My mom has always liked real estate and seeing homes. So given that it was freezing and windy, I thought this would be a good outing. Naturally Peter can't come with us because he is watching my dad. As you maybe able to figure out, Peter and I no longer do any activities alone. Back to the open houses..... after seeing more houses in my own area, I can safely say I picked the best house for our situation! That was a GOOD feeling actually.
Later this afternoon, we all went out to eat. Again to one of the three restaurants we dine at, where it is familiar to my dad. While Peter was driving to the restaurant, I literally fell asleep in the car. It was a great feeling and I wished the drive was longer.
No comments:
Post a Comment