Tonight's picture was taken in April of 2004, at Mattie's second birthday party! That year the theme was TRAINS. Mattie loved all things that moved, and it seemed like the perfect party for him. By year two, Mattie got the hang of birthday parties and participated and was engaged with family and friends! My parents were visiting for Mattie's birthday and my mom snapped this photo.
Quote of the day: Problems are not the problem; coping is the problem. ~ Virginia Satir
I got up at 6am today in order to make an appointment at my doctor's office for a blood test. My appointment was at 9:15am. But given all that I juggle in the morning, I needed ample time to get my dad up, washed, dressed, and breakfast made. While I was out of the house, my dad was visited by his in-home nurse and then his physical therapist.
I drove back and forth from home to Arlington, VA (where my appointment was), which took me about thirty minutes each way! When I got home it was in time to meet the physical therapist. As I am very concerned about my dad's lack of energy and ability to get up our staircase. Whatever they taught him in acute rehab in March went right out the window. He doesn't remember going up the stairs sideways, and frankly as I try to instruct him to do this, I find that his backside is leaning heavily on my shoulder. I know I am NOT strong enough to support his weight this way!
As soon as I parked the car and walked in the door, I was hit by a terrible smell. It smelled like rotten eggs. I quickly went to our Easter Eggs on display to determine if they spoiled. It wasn't the eggs. As I got closer to my dad, I realized the smell was coming from him. I am telling you it was awful, and wafting throughout the first floor. The physical therapist was working with him, so I did not want to stop the session, so I asked my mom whether my dad had a bowel movement recently. Mind you he had one before I showered him this morning. My mom responded that he did have another bowel movement, but that he was cleaned up. WRONG! NOT cleaned up at all. In fact, he must have soiled his Depends undergarment before he went to the bathroom, and no one changed him while I was gone. Instead, he was sitting in it, which is why the smell in the house was a nightmare.
After the therapist left, I brought my dad back to the bathroom. I cleaned and changed him, cleaned the bathroom, and Lysol'ed the entire first floor. Just another day in paradise.
All week, we have our landscape company working on our yard. They are planting trees and bushes and changing the look of one of the flower beds in the front yard. The activity of the landscapers triggered my neighbor to take notice. She called me today. Not to talk about the work, but to ask how I was doing! It was a qualified ask, because she then proceeded to give me a lecture about needing more help at home, that I can't do this alone. She then told me that I seem like a "control freak." If you want to rub me the WRONG way, you do two things...... you dictate to me what I should be doing and second call me a control freak! I was in check on the phone, and kept my attitude to myself, but was pretty silent and wasn't dialoguing. When I stop talking, YOU SHOULD WORRY! That is when you know you have lost me!
In any case, I do not care for help and support couched with judgment and pronouncements! Perhaps the intentions were good, but she clearly doesn't understand the full range of issues I am balancing. Nor do I wish to invest in telling her.
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