Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Tuesday, February 19, 2013 -- Mattie died 180 weeks ago today.

Tonight's picture was taken in February of 2009. The staff at the hospital quickly learned that Mattie LOVED cardboard boxes. So much so that they began saving all sorts of boxes for Mattie to use for design and building. Mattie transformed boxes into haunted houses, apartment buildings, an elevator, and the list goes on. Some of Mattie's boxed designs were quite elaborate with details like a hand crafted mosaic tile fireplace, a pulley system for an elevator, and ghosts that would swing through a house on wires to frighten you when you opened the door of this boxed house structure.


Quote of the day: The darkness that surrounds us cannot hurt us. It is the darkness in your own heart you should fear. ~ Silvetris


For all my readers who are Downton Abbey fans, what can I say?!!! I wasn't prepared for last night's season finale at all since I haven't been following the tabloids and media. Occasionally a TV series comes along that intrigues audiences both young and old alike. Downton Abbey is such a series! It has something for everyone and captures a period of time that is so different from our own, and yet hones in on human frailties, sensitivities, and emotions that we can all relate to such as...... marital problems, having children, paying bills, sibling rivalry, illness, death of a loved one, jealousy, and the list goes on! The series captures your heart and your mind and in many cases these characters become part of our weekly routine. We root for the under dogs (Branson, Edith, Anna, and Bates) and despise the more manipulative characters such as Mrs. O'Brien and Thomas. I am not sure how fictitious characters could cause us such happiness or such great sadness, but they do, and last night's episode sent SO many of us reeling.

I know I turn to Downton for an escape, to see the beauty of the English countryside, to have a glimpse into what life was like in the early 1900s, and to be absorbed in a beautifully told story that evokes both emotion and history. I first and foremost am an idealist or humanist at heart. I want to see the good in people and as such I want to believe that people can be motivated and inspired for the right reasons. I wish our motivations were always for intrinsic reasons and not for extrinsic rewards such as money. I am truly perplexed why the series would kill off a character who was loved and admired. So I went digging further into the reality of the decision. It would be easy to blame the writer of the series, but then I learned that the actual actor who played our beloved character, Matthew, wanted off the show. He wants to expand his horizons and stretch his artistic legs so to speak. All that comes to my mind is Shelley Long and her decision to leave Cheers! We know all too well how that worked out for our dear Diane Chambers!!! After her starring role on Cheers we never saw her again. I think when making decisions that are solely driven by money, one should pause. I am saddened that this actor on Downton Abbey couldn't see the joy he brought into homes each week and imagine this factor wasn't even considered when he made his decision to leave the show. In any case, we have ended season three with the deaths of two great characters. Both characters in the series were young individuals, so in essence unnatural deaths. Something I know about all too well, and though these characters aren't real, their death evokes feelings within me.

I am not sure what disturbs me more, the fact that characters were killed off on the show or that when season four starts up again, the time period will be six months after the death of Matthew (the character). The writer isn't exploring the raw emotions of grief and this I take issue with, but then again, what viewer would want to tune into such an ugly side of life!??? Which brings me back to Julian Fellowes (the writer of Downton Abbey's) comments, he felt that Matthew's character had to die because no one wanted to view happy ALL the time. I guess he thinks viewers don't tune into happy. Clearly he hasn't polled this viewer!

The one highlight in last night's depressing episode was it featured a beautiful castle in Scotland. This was the castle we toured this summer in Argyll. The name of the castle is Inveraray and some of my faithful readers may recall that Peter snapped a photo of my mom and I with the Duke of Argyll. The Duke lives in the castle and helps to support the castle by volunteering in the gift shop periodically. http://www.inveraray-castle.com/

 

I started my morning with receiving several photos from the awards ceremony that our friend Dave took at the conference. Pictured with Peter and I is Dr. Jimmie Holland. It was an honor being introduced and to receive this award from such a pioneer in the field. Jimmie is recognized internationally as the founder of the subspecialty of psycho-oncology, is Attending Psychiatrist and holds the first endowed chair in Psychiatric Oncology, the Wayne E. Chapman Chair at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. She is Professor of Psychiatry at Weill Medical College of Cornell University and began the first full-time Psychiatric Service in a cancer hospital in 1977 at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. In 1996, she became the first woman Chair of a clinical department at Memorial Sloan-Kettering.

 

 

Dave snapped an up close photo of Peter and I as we were returning to our seats after receiving the Foundation's award.

 

I received a lovely email today from Tricia, Mattie's amazing HEM/ONC nurse and our friend. Like me, Tricia loves the deer that live in the hills near my parent's home. I have nicknamed these deer the "LA Cappuccinos." My parents told me they haven't seen any deer for weeks. So I was absolutely stunned to see this family walk passed our car today. It is ironic that Tricia asked me about the deer this morning and low and behold they would show up almost on cue. I personally view this sign of nature as a gift from Mattie to Tricia and me.