Tonight's picture was taken in February of 2003. Mattie was 10 months old and he desperately wanted to learn how to stand and walk independently. Mattie received this activity table as a gift. Peter assembled it and was sitting next to Mattie playing along with him. Mattie loved hearing music and musical notes, so he would happily bang away at this table.
Quote of the day: That's the worst thing about dementia: it gets you every time. Sufferers look and act the same but beneath the familiar exterior something quite different is going on. They're in another world and you cannot enter. ~ Carol Thatcher
This morning, there was NO breakfast for my parents. They both had to fast because they were getting their annual blood work done at the doctor's office. In addition to bloodwork, my dad also had his annual physical. Fortunately I took my mom for her physical about ten days ago, otherwise today's visit would have taken forever.
Managing both of my parents at the doctor's office is a complete show. As I was helping my mom to the lab area of the clinic for her blood draw, I could see a tech was calling my dad back for his physical. I literally had to leave my mom's side and manage my dad. Out of the two of them, he most definitely can't interface with anyone without supervision. Thankfully I had given the tech my mom's paper work and she was seated waiting for her turn.
We had a new tech working with me and my dad today and I did not like her one bit! I thought she was clueless, insensitive, and had no bed side manner what so ever. But I took a deep breath and dealt with her. She wanted my dad to get out of his clothes and into a gown, and I refused. TWICE! By the second time she understood she was getting no where with me. Getting my dad out of his clothes and back into them is a true labor, of which I wasn't going to do!
The doctor himself is an interesting character. My faithful blog readers will know that I call him 'dopey.' The doctor keeps reminding my dad that he has to use his brain, because it is a muscle. The doctor wants my dad to learn a new word everyday. I have definitely added this request months ago to our daily schedule. But my dad can't remember past one minute. So he did not know that the word I gave him this morning to learn was WIZEN (to wither).
The doctor wants my dad to actively engage in activities and to be less of a couch potato. As research shows the more physically active you are as you age, the better your brain health. I get what he is saying, but frankly that ship has sailed away long ago. This is a conversation a doctor should have had with my dad 15 years ago! Now it is truly too late, not only because my dad is a physically lazy person by nature but because his cognitive decline makes learning and initiating things close to impossible. So when the doctor tells him to do things, he is basically telling me............ ADD THIS TO YOUR PLATE! Which only infuriates me!
The doctor continues to be troubled by the fact that my dad is incontinent to bowels. In fact, yesterday, my dad pooped all over the shower. The shower looked like a crime scene. The doctor feels that some of my dad's meds maybe causing this, whereas, I think this is a by-product of his dementia. So we disagree on this. The doctor has now asked me to STOP all of my dad's dementia meds. We stopped Donepezil two weeks ago and now we are also stopping Namenda. He seems to think I may see a difference in my dad's GI issues! I highly doubt it, but I am complying. But here is the real kicker. The doctor was telling me that dementia meds are very controversial and other than neurologists, most other medical doctors see very little evidence in the research to merit prescribing them! Well if that doesn't take away any hope from a caregiver, I don't know what would! Dementia is an absolutely horrible disease. It challenges me beyond description most days. It is like dealing with an obstreperous child, who has no memory.
My dad's memory issues are quite significant. It isn't just short term issues, but long term ones as well. He has no recollection of many of the houses he lived in and even when I show him photos of places and people, the photos don't jog his memory at all. He has no idea when my birthday is and so forth. Dementia has made him turn inward and the only thing on his mind is his own needs.
After my dad was examined, he then needed to get his blood drawn and the Prevnar 20 shot for pneumonia. Unfortunately my dad was very dehydrated so they couldn't get blood from either arm. So they moved to the wrist. In addition, they wanted him to submit a urine sample. That was equally hysterical. If you give him a cup, he has no idea what to do with it. In fact, when I take him into the bathroom, he has no idea what to do and his famous question to me is...... NO WHAT? He needs step by step instructions when in the bathroom, and I literally mean step by step..... walk over to the toilet, turn around, take down your pants, etc! Which meant that I had to capture the urine myself from him! I would like to know how on earth they get samples from other older adults who come in without family support?
Needless to say after this doctor visit, I felt worn out. But my day didn't stop there, because I had to take them both out to eat. What I particularly loved was that two of the techs in the doctor's office asked me directly..... am I going to get my parents something to drink and eat now (as they had been fasting and clearly hungry and dehydrated)? I found the whole line of questioning insulting and they clearly know nothing about me or what I do for my parents on a daily basis.
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