Thursday, February 23, 2012

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Tonight's picture was taken in June of 2002. Mattie was only two months old. However, when I look at some of Mattie's baby pictures he seemed so contemplative. I remember in kindergarten Mattie got a progress report from his school, and that first semester his art teacher described Mattie in the report as an "old soul." I think Debbie was indeed right, because in many ways Mattie just understood and felt certain things that were beyond his years.


Quote of the day: How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a weary world. ~ William Shakespeare


"So shines a good deed in a weary world!" I love this Shakespeare quote because I do believe it is the small things we do that make a large difference to people. It is ironic that I should reflect on this quote this evening, because recently one of the business school groups we are working with this semester submitted an analysis to us about the Foundation. One of the comments they had for us was that to grow larger we need to conserve our money for bigger and more nationally focused projects. Rather than for example, raise money to support a child life program at one hospital. Though I understand what they are saying in theory, I did push back at this group because I believe making a tangible difference (even if it is at one hospital) in the lives of children and their families battling cancer is imperative and at the end of the day, it is this that makes me feel good about what we are accomplishing. In order to have a national presence, I strongly believe a local one is needed first and also I find through working at Georgetown I continue to be made aware of the needs of families. Which is very grounding and humbling.

Today I had my first acupuncture experience. As I was sitting with the therapist for the first thirty minutes going over all the reasons that brought me to see her, I became overwhelmed with my own list. In fact, at one point I paused and said to her that if I were her, I would be thinking how does someone my age present with all of these health issues? She responded by saying that she was not taken aback but was more in amazement that I am dealing with all of this. I learned today that there is a difference between Chinese versus Japanese acupuncture. The therapist I saw today is trained in Japanese acupuncture techniques.

Japanese acupuncture significantly differs from other styles in its delicacy.
The obvious differences between Japanese and, say, Chinese practice, are that the needles are far finer (using needles barely thicker than a human hair), and that they are inserted often barely deeper than 1 or 2mm, with an absolute minimum of manipulation (thankfully because I have heard from others that this can be painful!). These techniques demand far greater precision and care than normal acupuncture. The therapist worked very hard today at trying to reduce my headache. I had needles in my feet, legs, arms, hands, stomach, neck, face, and head. I must admit that this hour long session did help to relax me, but my head is still pounding. I have had daily headaches for ten years now, so I cannot imagine they will go away quickly, yet I am hoping over time they become more manageable.

I have Foundation work piling up all around me, and yet between my headaches and my latest medical concern, I feel very distracted and on overload. I cannot seem to get relief from the headaches and they are absolutely debilitating in addition to other physical symptoms I am contending with. What weighs on my mind, and will for the next several days, is whether to have a biopsy next week. For those of you reading along and for writing to me, I thank you!