Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Tonight's picture was taken in April 2007, during Mattie's fifth birthday party. This was a party NEVER to be forgotten. Why? Well we held Mattie's party at the National Zoo. However, the Zoo's policy is that parties go on whether it is raining or sunny! That day the rain was torrential. I thought Mattie's party was going to be a disaster. But what I learned is NO ONE visits the Zoo in the rain. We had the Zoo to ourselves and the kids loved the adventure with rain boots and umbrellas. We walked all over and ironically the animals also seemed to love being out in the rain. 


Quote of the day: What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us. ~ Helen Keller

Today we visited the Flager Museum in Palm Beach. The museum was once the winter home to Mary Lily and Henry Flager. 

When "White Hall," the name of the house it was completed in 1902, the New York Herald proclaimed that Henry Flagler's Gilded Age estate in Palm Beach, was "more wonderful than any palace in Europe, grander and more magnificent than any other private dwelling in the world." Today, Whitehall is a National Historic Landmark and is open to the public as the Flagler Museum.

Henry Flager has an absolutely fascinating biography. If you want to read more about him, go to: http://www.flaglermuseum.us/history/flagler-biography
In a nut shell he came from modest beginnings but was a hard worker, bright, a sharp business man, and was credited by Rockerfeller as the "brains" behind their Standard Oil Company. Flager made his money in oil. However, at the age that most people retire, Flager developed a second career. Which was to build the Florida East Coast Railway, that basically allowed people to go from St. Augustine to Key West Florida. In addition to the railway, Flager developed over 14 hotels in Florida that tied into the railway system. Not just any hotels, but LUXURIOUS hotels. In essence Flager is credited for bringing the modernization and industry that Florida is known for today. 

Flager was married three times. His first wife basically had tuberculous and needed the warmer climates in the winter time. So he and his wife journeyed to Florida and it was then that Flager began to see the potential for development (for tourism and full time residents). After his first wife died, he then married her caregiver. However, that did not turn out well, since the second wife was mentally ill and was committed to a mental institution for the rest of her life. His third wife, Mary Lily was over 36 years his junior! Her desire was to have a BIG white house built for herself. Which was why White Hall was created as a wedding gift to Mary Lily.  

This is the Great Hall. It is the foyer that greets you as soon as you enter Whitehall. Whitehall is known to be a Gilded Age estate. The Gilded Age in United States history is the late 19th century, from the 1870s to about 1900. The term was coined by writer Mark Twain in The Gilded Age: A Tale of Today (1873), which satirized an era of serious social problems masked by a thin gold gilding.

This unique French clock sits in the Great Hall and it captures your attention immediately. It also has a charming chime that goes off on the 1/4 hour. 

This is a portrait of Mary Lily, Flager's third wife. Notice the strand of pearls around her neck. Back then the length of your pearls was a direct reflection on how much money you had. So clearly you can see Mary Lily was very wealthy. Not to mention that the necklace itself cost 1 million dollars to purchase. 

Though Mary Lily was in her thirties and Flager was 71 years old when they married, Mary Lily hosted many parties in their ballroom. 

This is the Dining Room. It is not the original table and chairs however. We were told that the original table sat over 22 people! All the ceilings in the rooms look like hand carved wood, but they were actually plaster. Painted to look like wood. 

The beautiful Drawing Room. This room had aluminum leafing all over it. At the time aluminum was more expensive than gold and silver. This room actually almost shimmers when you walk through it. 

This is Jean Matthews. She was Flager's grand daughter. Jean saved Whitehall. Whitehall went into disrepair and was going to be auctioned off. However, she purchased the house from the State in 1969 for $1.5 million. She then converted it to a museum. 

The house has 14 bedrooms.

This was the Master bedroom. It is very yellow but full of sunlight!

The house was ahead of its time. Each bedroom had its own closet and bathroom. The house also had electricity and a furnace for central heat.  This was the Master bath.

When Mary Lily died,  the home was devised to her niece Louise Clisby Wise Lewis, who sold the property to investors. They constructed a 300-room ten story addition to the west side of the building, obliterating Mr. Flagler's offices, the housekeeper's apartment, and altering the original kitchen and pantry area. Do NOTE that this 10 story hotel NO LONGER exists today and was demolished.

This was Flager's private railcar, called  Car 91. It was built in 1886. Flager frequently rode in this car on his Florida East Coast Railway (the ONLY railway that carried passengers throughout the length of Florida). 

Whitehall's beautiful outdoor courtyard.

THE FAMOUS BREAKERS HOTEL...................

In January of 1896, Henry Flagler opened his second hotel in Palm Beach, which he named the Palm Beach Inn. It was a simple and unpretentious hotel overlooking the ocean a quarter mile from Flagler's luxurious Hotel Royal Poinciana. During an expansion project in 1903, the Palm Beach Inn caught fire and was destroyed. By 1906 it was rebuilt and renamed The Breakers Hotel and opened to universal acclaim. Room rates started at four dollars a night (UNLIKE the $700 to $5,000 room rate today), and included three meals a day. The guest register read like a "Who's Who" of early twentieth century America - Rockefellers, Vanderbilts, Astors, Andrew Carnegie and J.P. Morgan vacationed alongside United States presidents and European nobility.

On March 18, 1925, twelve years after Flagler's death, tragedy struck The Breakers once again when another fire destroyed the all-wood structure. Mrs. Flagler’s family, who had inherited the Flagler System, were determined to build the world's finest resort as a testament to Henry Flagler's vision. The new resort would be constructed where the old hotel once stood. The notable New York-based architectural firm of Schultze & Weaver were invited to design The Breakers resort we know today. The Villa Medici in Rome was the inspiration for the new hotel’s facade. The Breakers reopened for the 1926-27 Season, and featured more than 400 guest rooms that overlooked the ocean, sumptuous public spaces, and world-class amenities. Today, The Breakers remains an impressive masterpiece of Gilded Age luxury and one of the world’s great resorts.

 The gardens at the Breakers are breathtaking. Do you see this REAL life duck in the garden?

The colors are simply incredible. These are gardens you just need to stop and take in. 

 The gardens continue!

 Beautiful pinks

 Its continues!

 Green Parrots were spotted in the trees!

Geese on golf course at the Breakers.

A rainbow pathway of color to the front of the hotel!

The Breakers cat!

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Tuesday, April 5, 2016 -- Mattie died 342 weeks ago today.

Tonight's picture was taken in April 2006, during Mattie's fourth birthday party. We held this party at the Riverbend Nature Center in Virginia. Mattie loved nature centers, walking through the woods, and of course learning about animals that lived in the woods. This birthday party came with a ranger, who introduced the children to live animals (like snakes, beetles, etc) and then took them for a nature walk. At the end of the walk, they got to excavate plastic dinosaurs in the nature center's large sand box. As you can see Mattie was smiling and happy that day.  



Quote of the day: The reality is that we don't forget, move on, and have closure, but rather we honor, we remember, and incorporate our deceased children and siblings into our lives in a new way. In fact, keeping memories of your loved one alive in your mind and heart is an important part of your healing journey.  ~ Harriet Schiff

Today we ventured to Mounts Botanical Garden of Palm Beach County. What an extraordinary place, that is doable to walk, and has over 12 different themed gardens. It is hard to believe that admission to the Gardens is only $5 per person.

The only downside of this garden is it is near the airport, so between tranquil moments, you are greeted by planes overhead. 

None the less, the landscape at the Gardens is stunningly beautiful. 

Here is the rainbow garden. Called that because there was a plethora of colors right before your eyes. 

I loved this wavy bench! It just begs you to sit down on it.

The pond is filled with turtles and fish. 

This tree is called a Mouse Trap Tree. The flowers on it look like a big yellow pansy. It got its name because the tree has sticky pods. When mice brush passed it, the seeds from the pods stick to the mouse, and literally the mouse then carries the seeds around propagating the tree. 

Glorious flowers. One of the gardeners told me that this botanical garden is designed to inspire the average gardener. She says that anyone can replicate the gardens we saw today. She said that many of them could also be grown in flower pots rather than in the ground. So I found that intriguing. She encouraged me to grow carrots, broccoli and cucumbers in a flower pot. 

Waterlilies which were floating in many of the ponds.

This is just a stunning tree called the Desert Rose.

Have you ever seen a Rainbow Eucalyptus tree? I know I haven't! The bark is literally all sorts of colors.

Never saw a Fish Tail Palm before either!

The beauty of the Silk Floss
tree.

The next several photos I captured for Mattie. Got to love this lizard on a tree. He wasn't thrilled by my presence.

This one is definitely a charmer!!! Mr. Iguana

I love how the iguana seems to change colors to blend into his environment. 

The butterfly garden was chock full of butterflies. The garden had all sorts of butterfly friendly plants to attract these fleeting creatures. 

The garden attracted all sorts of butterflies. 

Now this was a sighting Mattie would have loved..... a drawbridge going up, and a boat passing through. I can't see a drawbridge now without thinking of Mattie. I can still hear in my head how Mattie used to say the word... drawbridge. 

Monday, April 4, 2016

Monday, April 4, 2016 -- Today would have been Mattie's 14th birthday. 

Tonight's photo collage represents the years we were able to celebrate Mattie's birthday  ---- 2002 to 2009. Seven short years, but each birthday we made memorable together. 





Quote of the day: For some moments in life there are no words. ~  David Seltzer

It is hard to believe we had 7 Years with Mattie and NOW today marks 7 Years without Mattie. Mattie would have been 14 today. If you think time heals all wounds then you haven't lost a child. One of my favorite quotes says, "Do not judge the bereaved mother. She comes in many forms. She is breathing, but she is dying. She may look young, but inside she has become ancient. She smiles, but her heart sobs. She walks, she talks, she cooks, she cleans, she works, she is, but she is not, all at once. She is here, but part of her is elsewhere for eternity." This of course applies to the bereaved dad as well.

At Mattie's celebration of life service in 2009, I wrote this message below to Mattie. I always read this message on his birthdays and on the anniversary of his death. I share it with you, just like I ALWAYS did with him. He LOVED hearing about the DAY HE WAS BORN!!!

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My Dearest Mattie,

It is said that parents love their children right from the moment they are born. However, in your case, our love for you began as soon as we learned we were going to have a baby. In fact, right after seeing your sonogram picture, we felt like proud parents. We posted those pictures everywhere. We shared these pictures with practically anyone who would listen or showed interest, and each September when I taught prenatal development in my undergraduate human development class, out would come your sonogram pictures to illustrate my points. Even my students got a sneak peek at our baby, a baby who would have a profound and meaningful impact on not just his parents but also every community he touched. Daddy and I did not only love you, we FELL IN LOVE with you, and that love grew stronger with each day. Your energy, spirit, love for life, intellectual challenges, sense of humor, and loyalty to your friends and family were only some of the wonderful traits we always admired in you.

It seems fitting as we celebrate you, and say good-bye to your physical presence that I share the story about how you entered the world. The story of your birth had to be one of your most favorite stories to hear, and I found during times when you were reflective, overly tired, or in need of hugs and tenderness, the request for this story arose. In fact, I remember on August 5th, the day we found out that your cancer metastasized everywhere, you and I were sitting in the hospital’s rose garden, and you requested the story. It was almost as if you knew this was going to be a bad day, so in essence we might as well brace ourselves, cuddle, and prepare for this together.

Here is the story I always shared with you. A story Daddy and I will never forget. On April 2, 2002, at 11pm, I decided to head to bed. I was anxiously awaiting your birth, and as your due date approached, I couldn’t help but wonder, when will “the baby” be coming? I was restless and uncomfortable, so while in bed, I began to watch television. I was having trouble concentrating on what I was hearing, mainly because you were kicking up a storm inside of me. At which point, the kicking became so intense, that I literally felt something pop. You clearly wanted OUT, and you were going to kick your way into the world on your terms. Naturally after feeling this pop, I looked down at my tummy, and when I jumped out of bed, I realized my water had broken. This only happens to 25% of moms, and in retrospect, I should have guessed that this was just the beginning of how different our lives were going to be together. I immediately called the doctor and told her what happened. She asked if I was in pain, which I wasn’t, and she instead told me to get a good night’s rest, because my baby was going to be born the following day. Well I can assure you after hearing this news, sleeping was the farthest thing from our minds.

So on April 3, 2002, Daddy and I headed to the hospital and we were admitted to the maternity unit at 8am. The labor process began, but it was a VERY slow process for me, and at times as you moved inside my tummy, Daddy could see your head pushing against my backbone. Needless to say Dr. Mike, the anesthesiologist, became my favorite doctor that day. The hours kept rolling by, and still there was NO sign of our baby! I was getting weaker, I developed an 102 fever, and by 11pm I really had no energy to give birth to you. In addition, to how I was feeling, your oxygen supply was getting cut off, and your chin was positioned in such a way that would make the birthing process almost impossible. So it was at that point that the doctor recommended an emergency c-section. Things began to happen very quickly around me. I was signing paperwork for surgery and Daddy was being transformed by putting on a bunny suit so he could enter the operating room.

I had never been in an operating room before in my life, but I really wasn’t concerned at that point about myself. I was solely focused upon you. I was wide-awake for the c-section, but unable to see the process, which as you know, was probably a good thing. Daddy on the other hand found the whole thing very exciting, and began to videotape and take pictures of the surgery. Literally a team of people surrounded me and I will never forget Dr. Mike, the anesthesiologist who sat by my side, and talked with me and did whatever he could to keep me pain free.

When you have a c-section, your arms are strapped to the operating table, so I couldn’t move, and directly over my head was what appeared to be a rope with a clamp that was holding open my abdominal cavity. Normally by this point I would have passed out, but when it came to you, I developed strength I never knew I had. As the doctor began cutting, and finally got to you, the first thing she said was, “what is this?” That is NOT what you typically hope to hear when having a c-section. The doctor let me know that I had a grapefruit sized tumor on my bladder, and my immediate thought was, did this affect the baby? The next thing I knew, I felt her tugging, and I heard the loudest cry ever. Now here is the part of the story that I know was always your FAVORITE! I would always try to replicate the sound I heard coming from you that day, a sound that will always remain in a parent’s ear. It was a very large WAAHHH! WAAHHH! At which point the doctor told us two things: first, that you were one of the most beautiful babies she had ever seen, and second, that you had quite a set of lungs on you! I concurred with both statements.

The doctor then brought you over to me, and she felt that I needed to be the first person to touch you. So despite my arms strapped to the table, my right hand miraculously reached out and grabbed your tiny, soft, and cute foot. It was a moment I will always cherish, a moment in which I will never forget, and a moment I am so happy you too enjoyed hearing about. Each time I retold the story I felt as if it further bonded us together, and I always enjoyed hearing your comments, thoughts, and reactions to your story.

Seeing you made Daddy very happy! Though he was worried about me, since after the c-section, I had to have bladder surgery to remove the tumor, we both agreed that Daddy should stay with you and accompany you to the nursery. It is there that Daddy got to see you cleaned up, he learned that you weighed 6 pounds and 13 ounces, and that you had high Apgar scores of 8 and 9. Within an instant, Daddy became one of your fiercest protectors, and he cared for you for five days straight while we were in the hospital together. In fact, Daddy is the first person who changed your diaper, and though those were five very challenging days in the hospital, they were days that helped us form our strong family ties. Ties that were imperative and that we relied on for seven years of your life!

Your presence is so greatly missed. Nothing seems the same, is the same, looks, feels, or tastes the same without you in our lives. May you always know that Mommy and Daddy love you, cherish you, and that feeling will remain with us forever and always. Good-bye my Mooshi Moo angel and goodbye Daddy’s best buddy. With love from Una Moon and Daddy!

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In Mattie's memory, Peter and I explored the Loxahatchee Wildlife Refuge in Boynton Beach. The Refuge includes the most northern remnant of the historic Everglades wetland ecosystem. It was fascinating and right up Mattie's alley.

Here are our 7 sightings today that reminded us of Mattie. Seven sightings for the 7 years we had him in our lives.

Sun rising into a very cloudy sky!

The butterfly is my symbol for Mattie. One of Mattie's favorite colors was orange, which is why orange is one of Mattie Miracle's primary colors. 

I have never seen locusts up close. But literally they were ALL around us and walking with us. I felt like I was in the Old Testament of the Bible. It actually was a very creepy feeling because they were hopping, walking, and jumping all around us by the hundreds. 

My first close encounter with a 2-3 foot alligator!

Blue Heron

 Water lily

The beauty of the refuge.

Sunday, April 3, 2016

Sunday, April 3, 2016

Tonight's picture was taken in April 2005, during Mattie's third birthday party. The theme of the party was "Blues Clues." Mattie loved the cartoon character Blues and enjoyed playing the game of finding three clues to guess what Blues was thinking! We created our own Blues Clues game at the party and I remember this being one of Mattie's happier parties. Mainly because he was older and understood the notion of people coming over and celebrating his day. 


Quote of the day: Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone. ~ Fred Rogers

Our balcony doesn't disappoint. Yesterday we saw a wedding from it and today we saw a Carnival Ship passing by!

The ship may not be that unusual to see, but what do you think about a baptism in the Ocean? That was a new one for me. Check out this teen between the two men. Watch what happens to him in the next photo.

The fellow was COMPLETELY dunked in the ocean! Mind you this morning was cool and very windy!!! 

Hibiscus line the outdoor terrace at the hotel. 

Peter and I drove to Boynton Beach today to have lunch with my friend, Nancy and her husband Marv. Nancy and I have known each other for many years, as we both were leaders in a national professional counseling organization. Nancy lives part of the year in Florida, and every April when we come here, we try to reconnect! Right outside the restaurant was this beautiful bougainvillea.

Peter snapped a photo of me with Nancy and Marv. One of their grandsons is planning to do fundraising for Mattie Miracle next year and Nancy's grand daughter, who is only 9, won a costume contest with her friends. As part of the prize she won $200, and plans to donate that to Mattie Miracle. Very special, appreciated, and meaningful. 

Later this afternoon, the SUN finally came out. It was a welcomed sighting, so we went for a walk along the beach. 

While walking I noticed things that looked like plastic. I can imagine litter on the beach, but EVERYWHERE. It made no sense. So I took a photo of this so I could do some research. Turns out that these clear and blue things that look like plastic are sail Jellyfish or otherwise known as vellela. Their sail when up helps to propel them over the surface of the sea. 

Also came across this Portuguese man o' war jellyfish air sac. These gas filled sacs help jellyfish move across the surface of the ocean. 

The beauty of the surf, with natural rock formations in the sand. 

The beach behind the hotel. 

I started collecting shells today. This is something Mattie loved to do! I think he would have loved to see all the jellyfish too!