Thursday, April 5, 2018

Thursday, April 5, 2018

Tonight's picture was taken by Peter on April 4, 2002. At 12:53 am,  the morning that Mattie was born. Peter followed Mattie into the nursery of the hospital and watched him being cleaned off, weighed and so forth. But what I love about this photo, was you could tell how alert Mattie was from day one! 



Quote of the day: There's no tragedy in life like the death of a child. Things never get back to the way they were. ~ Dwight D. Eisenhower

I have found my favorite restaurant in Naples, FL. It is called Baleen and it is located at the LaPlaya Beach Resort. The setting is just incredible and the food matches the beauty! Which in Naples is a rare combination. This is where we dined on Mattie's 16th birthday last night. 

From our table, we got to watch the sun setting into the Gulf of Mexico. 

A glorious sight!

People all around us were photographing this moment, and when the sun finally disappeared into the water, people were clapping. As if they had just seen a show! It was a first for me. 

Today we headed to Marco Island. Marco Island is about 40 minutes from Naples. I have heard about this Island for years and since we were so close to the Island, I felt we had to see it. Our first stop on Marco Island was to Brigg's Boardwalk. This nature trail is about .5 miles long. 

It was 91 degrees today, but felt hotter in the sun. From the boardwalk, we could see many birds wading in the water from the trail. 

The trail took us through a forest of Slash Pines. I had never heard of this type of pine. But apparently you can tap this tree and from it they make turpentine, tar, and resin. The bark is fascinating as it reminds me of a California Ponderosa. 

Of course no trip would be complete without an alligator sighting! This was a tiny, baby alligator. 

After the boardwalk, we headed to the only other major attraction on Marco Island, Otter Mound. 

The Mound is named for a previous resident, Ernest Otter a one-time owner who had occupied the property until 1997. Otter is credited for the unique whelk shell terraces that define the preserve’s signature man-made feature.

While at the Mound, we had the opportunity to talk to two other visitors there. It turns out that the man we were talking to was the nephew of Ernest Otter. He had never visited this property before, so for him it was like visiting a piece of his family's history. It is a shame that his family doesn't still own this property.  


Otter Mound and the property surrounding it was a home site for early settlers who worked in the Marco Island clamming industry. The "Mound" on which Otter Mound Preserve sits was constructed by the Calusa native inhabitants from oyster, southern surf clam, lightning whelk, and other shellfish species and dates between 700 AD – 1200 AD.

Ernest Otter's amazing work! Walls and walls made of whelk shells. Shells that were left behind by Native Americans. 







There was once a house on the Mound. But it no longer exists. The only remaining structure was the house's outhouse!

Our last stop on Marco Island was to see the JW Marriott hotel. I have heard about this hotel from so many people, that I wanted to see if for myself. It is certainly a lovely property, that captures the beauty of the Gulf. Yet I have learned that Marco Island is not for me. It is too beachy, without much else to do. 

Peter and I love being by the beach, but we are not sun or water worshipers. So we know when visiting a beach area, there has to be other attractions to visit. 

In the hotel lobby is this wonderful sand castle!

This is why the property is sought after! It is for this view and access to an amazing beach. 

On the beach was this cute Easter sandcastle! It says Happy Thanksgiving, followed by April Fools! Since Easter was on April Fools this year. 

If someone is going to get bitten, it's going to be me. Peter hasn't been touched. I have met the Florida sandfly, also nicknamed the No See Ums. They are absolutely hateful. You can't see them but what a bite. Not your ordinary bite either as they produce BIG and very itchy welts. I have read that you shouldn't scratch them, as it makes it worse. So I am complying, but WOW! My legs and neck have been eaten alive. 

Where did I get most of these bites? Not on the nature trails, but at a restaurant called The Bay House. The restaurant is located on one of the inlets and while eating dinner, they attacked me.  

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Wednesday, April 4, 2018
Mattie's 16th Birthday

Quote of the day: To lose a son under those circumstances - a violent death like my son went through, it just puts a burden on your heart. ~ Brian Jones




It is hard to believe that Mattie would have been 16 years old today. We can't even imagine what teenage Mattie would be like, as to us he is forever 7. We celebrated 7 birthdays with Mattie and now 9 without him. A rather depressing notion. No matter how much time goes on, we are left wondering why Mattie? Why us? In fact, we went to an ice cream store this afternoon (a Mattie favorite thing to do) and while there I observed a mom with four children, and she was pregnant with her fifth. All I could think was...... here is a clueless mom, who doesn't know life with childhood cancer. I know a rather mean thought coming from my head, but I am not perfect and have my angry and NOT so NICE side as well. 

Peter and I visited the Naples Botanical Gardens today. They were rather underwhelming, but within the flowers and bushes they displayed animated dinosaurs. Mattie would have gotten a total kick out of these displays and would have enjoyed the scavenger hunt through the gardens in search of dinos. Before I share those photos with you, you will find a letter I wrote to Mattie after he died. I had this letter on display at Mattie's celebration of life ceremony n October 10, 2009. The letter highlights the day Mattie was born. Mattie loved hearing about the day he was born and under stressful times, Mattie always requested this story. In fact on August 5th, the day Mattie's cancer was deemed terminal, Mattie crawled into my lab and requested to hear about April 4, 2002! 

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Letter on display at Mattie's Celebration of Life:

My Dearest Mattie,

It is said that parents love their children right from the moment they are born. However, in your case, our love for you began as soon as we learned we were going to have a baby. In fact, right after seeing your sonogram picture, we felt like proud parents. We posted those pictures everywhere. We shared these pictures with practically anyone who would listen or showed interest, and each September when I taught prenatal development in my undergraduate human development class, out would come your sonogram pictures to illustrate my points. Even my students got a sneak peek at our baby, a baby who would have a profound and meaningful impact on not just his parents but also every community he touched. Daddy and I did not only love you, we FELL IN LOVE with you, and that love grew stronger with each day. Your energy, spirit, love for life, intellectual challenges, sense of humor, and loyalty to your friends and family were only some of the wonderful traits we always admired in you.

This video is a tribute to you and your wonderful, yet short life. It seems fitting as we celebrate you, and say good-bye to your physical presence that I share the story about how you entered the world. The story of your birth had to be one of your most favorite stories to hear, and I found during times when you were reflective, overly tired, or in need of hugs and tenderness, the request for this story arose. In fact, I remember on August 5th, the day we found out that your cancer metastasized everywhere, you and I were sitting in the hospital’s rose garden, and you requested the story. It was almost as if you knew this was going to be a bad day, so in essence we might as well brace ourselves, cuddle, and prepare for this together.

Here is the story I always shared with you. A story Daddy and I will never forget. On April 2, 2002, at 11pm, I decided to head to bed. I was anxiously awaiting your birth, and as your due date approached, I couldn’t help but wonder, when will “the baby” be coming? I was restless and uncomfortable, so while in bed, I began to watch television. I was having trouble concentrating on what I was hearing, mainly because you were kicking up a storm inside of me. At which point, the kicking became so intense, that I literally felt something pop. You clearly wanted OUT, and you were going to kick your way into the world on your terms. Naturally after feeling this pop, I looked down at my tummy, and when I jumped out of bed, I realized my water had broken. This only happens to 25% of moms, and in retrospect, I should have guessed that this was just the beginning of how different our lives were going to be together. I immediately called the doctor and told her what happened. She asked if I was in pain, which I wasn’t, and she instead told me to get a good night’s rest, because my baby was going to be born the following day. Well I can assure you after hearing this news, sleeping was the farthest thing from our minds.

So on April 3, 2002, Daddy and I headed to the hospital and we were admitted to the maternity unit at 8am. The labor process began, but it was a VERY slow process for me, and at times as you moved inside my tummy, Daddy could see your head pushing against my backbone. Needless to say Dr. Mike, the anesthesiologist, became my favorite doctor that day. The hours kept rolling by, and still there was NO sign of our baby! I was getting weaker, I developed an 102 fever, and by 11pm I really had no energy to give birth to you. In addition, to how I was feeling, your oxygen supply was getting cut off, and your chin was positioned in such a way that would make the birthing process almost impossible. So it was at that point that the doctor recommended an emergency c-section. Things began to happen very quickly around me. I was signing paperwork for surgery and Daddy was being transformed by putting on a bunny suit so he could enter the operating room.

I had never been in an operating room before in my life, but I really wasn’t concerned at that point about myself. I was solely focused upon you. I was wide-awake for the c-section, but unable to see the process, which as you know, was probably a good thing. Daddy on the other hand found the whole thing very exciting, and began to videotape and take pictures of the surgery. Literally a team of people surrounded me and I will never forget Dr. Mike, the anesthesiologist who sat by my side, and talked with me and did whatever he could to keep me pain free.

When you have a c-section, your arms are strapped to the operating table, so I couldn’t move, and directly over my head was what appeared to be a rope with a clamp that was holding open my abdominal cavity. Normally by this point I would have passed out, but when it came to you, I developed strength I never knew I had. As the doctor began cutting, and finally got to you, the first thing she said was, “what is this?” That is NOT what you typically hope to hear when having a c-section. The doctor let me know that I had a grapefruit sized tumor on my bladder, and my immediate thought was, did this affect the baby? The next thing I knew, I felt her tugging, and I heard the loudest cry ever. Now here is the part of the story that I know was always your FAVORITE! I would always try to replicate the sound I heard coming from you that day, a sound that will always remain in a parent’s ear. It was a very large WAAHHH! WAAHHH! At which point the doctor told us two things: first, that you were one of the most beautiful babies she had ever seen, and second, that you had quite a set of lungs on you! I concurred with both statements.

The doctor then brought you over to me, and she felt that I needed to be the first person to touch you. So despite my arms strapped to the table, my right hand miraculously reached out and grabbed your tiny, soft, and cute foot. It was a moment I will always cherish, a moment in which I will never forget, and a moment I am so happy you too enjoyed hearing about. Each time I retold the story I felt as if it further bonded us together, and I always enjoyed hearing your comments, thoughts, and reactions to your story.

Seeing you made Daddy very happy! Though he was worried about me, since after the c-section, I had to have bladder surgery to remove the tumor, we both agreed that Daddy should stay with you and accompany you to the nursery. It is there that Daddy got to see you cleaned up, he learned that you weighed 6 pounds and 13 ounces, and that you had high Apgar scores of 8 and 9. Within an instant, Daddy became one of your fiercest protectors, and he cared for you for five days straight while we were in the hospital together. In fact, Daddy is the first person who changed your diaper, and though those were five very challenging days in the hospital, they were days that helped us form our strong family ties. Ties that were imperative and that we relied on for seven years of your life!

Your presence is so greatly missed. Nothing seems the same, is the same, looks, feels, or tastes the same without you in our lives. May you always know that Mommy and Daddy love you, cherish you, and that feeling will remain with us forever and always. Good-bye my Mooshi Moo angel and goodbye Daddy’s best buddy. With love from Una Moon and Daddy!

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The Naples Botanical Garden consists of 170 acres of cultivated gardens and preservation land, representing seven distinct natural habitats and ecosystems, and featuring over 1,000 species. 

Usually I wouldn't enter the children's garden, but it was within this garden that they had a small butterfly house. Peter snapped this photo of me on a butterfly bench in the house. 

It is hard to tell but all the dinosaurs were animated and also made noise!

This one matched Peter!

A big t-rex!

This dino made such a loud sound, you could hear it throughout the gardens. I get why they had the dinos, but frankly it was very distracting to the adult visitor who was looking for tranquil beauty! 

The gardens were filled with many water themes!

It was blazingly hot today, but we did try to go on the walking trail within the gardens. Along our pathway, we got the attention of an osprey! 

This is what the gardens looked like. More foliage than flowers. But still beautiful. The confusing part to Peter and me was that all the ecosystems within this garden looked exactly alike. We could hardly tell where the Brazilian garden started and the Florida garden, for example, began. 

I can't see any water lilies without thinking of Monet!

Peter pointed this out. See the ladybug?!

The Gardens had an extensive display of orchids. 

A poinsettia tree! A typical sighting in the Caribbean. 

Do you see this alligator made out of plantings? 

 The beauty of orchids. 

 Orchids in all colors!

Many of the orchids were attached to trees, and growing like air plants. 

Another beauty!

A bromeliad like no other.... it has a zebra pattern. 

Tuesday, April 3, 2018

Tuesday, April 3, 2018 -- Mattie died 446 weeks ago today. 

Tonight's picture was taken on Easter of 2007. Mattie was five years old. We took him to the US Arboretum to see the azaleas. My joke with Mattie was that these glorious flowers came out in honor of his birthday. Mattie loved that notion. 




Quote of the day: I think we need to do some deep soul searching about what's important in our lives and renew our spirit and our spiritual thinking, whether it's through faith-based religion or just through loving nature or helping your fellow man. ~ Louie Schwartzberg

Going out to dinner is one of my favorite things to do when away, because I like trying new restaurants. Naples has your standard chains like Cheesecake Factory, Season's 52, and California Pizza Kitchen. But I like to experience more locally run restaurants on trips. 

The West coast of Florida, I have found is much more limited in dining selections than the East coast of Florida. Nonetheless, there are many to choose from in Naples unlike other towns on the West coast. Last night we had a hellish dining experience. We went to a restaurant called FISH. This is a photo of the view from FISH. Looks lovely doesn't it? That is where the lovely ended. We made a 6:30pm reservation. We got there and we could see the restaurant wasn't busy. However, we were told that we had to wait 15 minutes to be seated. So we did. After 20 minutes Peter went up to see what the hold up was because literally the restaurant had SEVERAL open tables. Needless to say, we waited 30 minutes until we were shown to our table. I wish that was the only issue. After waiting 10 minutes, I then got up from the table to find the manager because no one stopped by our table to take even a drink order. I suspect the hostess sat us at a table that did not have an assigned server. 

When I went to track down the hostess, I told her I wanted to talk to the manager. I instead got the owner who had to be the rudest person I have ever had the displeasure of meeting in the service industry. Before I opened my mouth, he verbally attacked me. He basically said I did not understand his plight. He had three people who did not report to work and was overwhelmed. 

There is a nice way to say this, but it did not come out nicely. Instead, he kept telling me I wasn't listening to him. Of course he wasn't listening to me at all. In fact, he could care less what my issue was.... he never asked what he could do for us, never offered to comp an appetizer or to even find us a wait staff person to serve us right away. He followed me back to my table, and began to also argue with Peter. Once he walked away, Peter and I got up and left the restaurant without eating. We weren't going to spend a penny there after being treated so poorly. Ironically, later in the evening I was going to write a review of the restaurant on Open Table (where I made our reservation). However, the restaurant canceled our reservation preventing us from writing a review. I did not go to bed last night until writing a scathing review on Trip Advisor, Yelp, and also contacting Open Table directly. The owner of this restaurant should consider another job because he clearly hates what he does and it shows!!! 

After we walked out of the restaurant, we had to then find a place to have dinner. Given that it is spring break for many schools, Naples is busy. Nonetheless, we decided to eat away from the water, and went to Ocean Prime on 5th avenue (which is the main street in downtown Naples). It was the BEST restaurant we have gone to so far on our trip! Our server was delightful and VERY professional. After the experience we had at FISH, we really needed Ocean Prime. 

The fun continued this morning. We were told that our hotel rents out kayaks. However, there appears to be great confusion about how to actually rent out a kayak. The pool staff doesn't even know what a kayak is and the front desk gave us conflicting information. Finally, the concierge told us that we actually had to go to the beach to rent a kayak. That may sound like NO problem. But getting to the beach at this hotel requires a .5 mile walk, on a board walk. I am giving you an aerial view so you get the idea of the walk through a mangrove on a board walk to the beach. Most people take a tram on the boardwalk and refuse to make the .5 mile walk on foot. Peter and I love to walk, so naturally we walked. But we do feel this hotel is a misnomer and shouldn't be called a resort as this beach is a public beach and very crowded. Also Hurricane Irma did a number to this beach and when you get out to it, it doesn't have as much of a sandy beach as indicated in this hotel photo!

Once we walked .5 miles and got to the beach, there was a LONG line to get into the beach. Why the line? Well the line processes requests like chairs, towels, umbrellas and also equipment rentals like kayaks. The problem with this line is that hotel guests and the public have to wait on the same line. If that were the only problem that would be great! The person working behind the counter is very young and NOT professional, yet he is managing all the staff working the beach. I should tell you that this service is contracted out, these are not hotel employees. Which makes sense since this is a public beach. The fellow processed our kayak request and charged our room for the rental. He then told us to wait by the beach and his staff member would help us into the kayak. We went out to the beach, but it was broiling hot and totally chaotic. So I went back and spoke to this fellow, and asked him if we could just take the kayak now on our own. He refused, as he said his staff members had to assist us. I asked him when that would be and he snapped. Again, I got a litany about 8 people not showing up for work and they were overwhelmed. This time I told him that I understood his problem, but his problem shouldn't be my problem. Since it was quite clear his two staff people were busy moving beach chairs, umbrellas and getting food, I demanded our money back. I could see us waiting an hour in the sun for the elusive staff member to help us. So another poor service experience! Which seems to be a trend in Naples. Every manager we have met is complaining about poor and unprofessional staff. That may be so, but I blame management for hiring such inappropriate people and not training them. 

We did land up kayaking for 90 minutes. Thankfully the second concierge we interacted with today, told us about another rental company we could get to by car. 

Certainly today's water experience was lovely, but it doesn't compare to our last two trips down in the Everglades. The Everglades is simply fascinating, peaceful and filled with wild life. 

We took the kayak on the Cocohatchee River and passed all these sights. Very different from our Everglades experience the past two days. Yet the water was smooth, very shallow, and the sky was blue. Unlike in DC. 

The river is lined with many housing communities. 

We paddled under this bridge. Fortunately Peter is an experienced oars men, because there is NO way I could have managed this kayak for 90 minutes. I literally would have been paddling in circles. 

View from under the bridge!

Our two major sightings today were this white egret and.....

A mother osprey and her chicks. We were up close and personal with these birds and I assure you an osprey is one big bird! I find it quite amazing that they mate for life and use the same nest and location year after year. 

All I know is if Mattie were with us, he would have said to me.... look a mama and her babies.... like you and me! 

Monday, April 2, 2018

Monday, April 2, 2018

Tonight's picture was taken in April of 2006. Mattie was four years old. I took Mattie to the Reston Zoo. This was one of Mattie's favorite zoos. Mainly because it was small, not crowded, and provided a very hands on experience for children. At the zoo, Mattie could ride ponies, take a wagon ride to see ostriches, and even feed goats and sheep. All of these things were fun for Mattie and in the process I experienced things I never did before too. Mattie and I had different interests and as his mom, I had to learn to find and do things that engaged his mind. So in the process of raising Mattie, I developed an appreciation for being outside and exploring nature. 


Quote of the day: A rebirth out of spiritual adversity causes us to become new creatures. ~ James E. Faust


Since Friday, I have been on a Segway tour, taken a boat assisted Kayak tour of the 10,000 islands, went to the Corkscrew Swamp Sanctuary, and today went on a two hour kayak tour of the everglades. I would call this an adventuresome trip. My lifetime friend, Karen, wrote to me and said that even my vacations make her tired. Which made me laugh!!! What I do know is Mattie would have loved every single adventure we have gone on so far. 

We went on an Everglades Adventure Tour today. Our guide was Joe, a man who has basically be giving tours of the Everglades for over 12 years. This tour company is family owned and operated, and I like supporting family businesses. The Shealy family is among the last of the traditional Gladesmen. For 4 generations they have lived in the Big Cypress Swamp.

The company doesn't have tandem kayaks. Joe was nice enough to offer that I ride in his canoe, so that I did not have to paddle if I did not want to. I agreed to this arrangement for two reasons. It is hot and terribly sunny, and I did not know if I had the ability to row for two hours straight in this weather. Peter is an experienced crewmen, so I knew he would be fine. I had a great time with Joe as he had a gentle and kind demeanor and was very knowledgeable about the Everglades. 

Peter observing what I called alligator alley. We saw more alligators in the wild today then I have ever seen. What stunned me was the alligators weren't interested in us. They observed us, but did not approach. Joe said that alligators typically don't bother people unless they have been trained to come to boats for food. Which is why people aren't encouraged to feed alligators. If alligators do approach boats, then the tour company calls animal control to manage that alligator. Basically remove it because it will be dangerous to humans. 

This is the type of water we were on today. It is very shallow, less then two feet deep and these canals are ALL formed by rain water. This is their dry season, so this is the remaining water left from the summer and fall. Which should give you an appreciation for how much rain they get in rainy season! 

It was like floating on glass! So smooth and SO SO quiet and peaceful. Not sure I have ever heard such silence before.  

The canals are all lined with trees. A mixture of cypress, oaks, and maples. It was remarkable to see bromeliads and other air plants growing all over the bark of trees. Some were even flowering.  

Do you see all the alligators here? There were at least 8 gators and of all sizes. Apparently April is alligator mating season. They mate once a year and can produce up to 50 eggs a year. Not all of the eggs make it, as they can get snatched and eaten by bigger birds. 

Can you picture this??? We were floating along, feet from these alligators! The eerie part was when we saw just the two eyes of alligators staring at us in the water, with the rest of their bodies submerged.  

We passed this mother osprey on her nest with her babies. The screech of these birds is recognizable! You can hear them from quite a distance. 

This was father osprey looking and monitoring the nest with the mom and babies. Apparently osprey are monogamous. Ironically the birds mate once a year and then the father and mother go in different directions during the winter. But always return to the SAME PLACE and nest each spring to mate again. 

A close up of an immature night heron. He is hard to see, as he is very brown and blends in with the bark of trees. 

A great blue heron. 

This is what seeing a gator was like for us today. They were floating alongside us. They have their hang outs along the canal and Joe had names for many of them. One of the male gators he named Goliath. Goliath is about 14 feet long. We did not see him today, but I felt the other gators were quite formidable. 

Look closely! There are FOUR baby alligators in and among the green foliage. 

We came back to the hotel to regroup, as we have had very early mornings the past couple of days. When I look outside on our balcony, I see hotel guests parked on a chair by the pool. Most of them there the whole day. Baking in the sun. Peter and I like seeing the sun, but not baking in the sun. But besides that main difference, I feel like people have access to such natural beauty so close by and don't take advantage of it. I wonder why they aren't venturing out and showing it to their children? It made Peter and me reflect on what this trip would have looked like if Mattie were with us. Mattie wasn't one for sitting still, or hanging out at a pool for more than an hour. I always admired families who could park themselves for hours in one place. I did not have a child like that, and I suppose it is good that Mattie wasn't like this because he would have missed out on so much. In true Mattie fashion, he was always busy, engaged, and exploring, and of course we were along for the ride with him.