Sunday, July 28, 2019

Sunday, July 28, 2019

Tonight's picture was taken in July of 2007. That weekend, like many weekends, we took Mattie to Roosevelt Island. Peter snapped a photo of us as we were crossing over the bridge to get to the Island. The Island holds many special memories. So much so, that the first year after Mattie died, Peter would get up very very early and walk the Island by himself. Now we share the Island with Sunny, but of course my first thought always when crossing this bridge is Mattie. 







Quote of the day: I BELIEVE IN ANGELS, THE KIND THAT HEAVEN SENDS. I’M SURROUNDED BY ANGELS, AND I CALL THEM MY BEST FRIENDS. ~ PAMELA DARANJO

I was scheduled to meet my friend Ann and her husband, Bob, at Clyde's today. I thought the four of us were getting together for a birthday brunch. It never dawned on me that there was a surprise party planned. Something that Peter and Ann cooked up together for months. I consider myself observant, yet I have no idea how I interacted with Peter daily and my friends, and no one told me. 

I am not your typical person. Some people like surprises and parties. Unfortunately I am not one of them. After Mattie died, my feelings about being in a group has changed dramatically, not to mention that I do better celebrating others than myself.   

With that said, I am deeply grateful that my husband and good friends thought about me so much that they planned this party. I am holding onto that feeling, yet if I was being completely honest, parties make me sad. Sad bordering on depressed. 

My mom was clearly busy as she sent Ann a ton of photos. Photos of me were scattered throughout the room! It was like a walk down memory lane. Some photos I don't ever remember taking! It was like seeing them for the first time. 

Anyone who knows me knows that I wouldn't have worn this old sun dress to a party. To me what I wear also impacts how I feel.

The flowers were beautiful. Sunflowers are special to me, and the colors highlighted Mattie Miracle! 

Peter and Ann made this special collage for me. The photos were priceless, and I appreciate my mom digging through albums at home to retrieve them. 

Our group today!

Photos on plants! Photos everywhere. I am a big photo person, so this was very meaningful. 

Peter designed the most amazing cake! He had it done at Creative Cakes! This is the same bakery we used for many of Mattie's birthday cakes. So this holds even more meaning to me. 

The top layer was chocolate and the bottom was lemon with raspberries. Both were incredibly delicious! 

The photo on the left was with me and Ginger, the German Shepherd. Ginger was my neighbor's dog. Who I used to walk. I never remember even posing for this photo. I had to be around 13. 

A friend of mine created this touching listing of things she loves about me! I found it very touching. In fact, Ann made me a memory book which highlights photos and special sentiments from my friends and family!

Do you see the book? It is priceless.

Some of the brunch items. 

Me with Ann. 

Me with Tricia. Mattie's favorite nurse. Tricia is practically part of our family and honestly when I feel uncertain about things (like a party), she seems to know to stay close. 

Me with my friend Denise. As Denise mentioned today, she was the second person in the room who has known me the longest. We went to graduate school together and have been friends ever since. Peter and I value her whole family's support!

Me with my friends Catherine and Brian. Mattie went to preschool with their daughter, Sara Catherine. 

 Peter hired Michelle, a pianist! She played "the way you look tonight" several times. A famous Frank Sinatra song, which Peter and I danced to at our wedding. 

 Me with my friends Margy and Ken. Margy is my first Facebook friend. We have a lot in common and share a special friendship. 

Me with my friends Ilona and Attila. Ilona also lost her only child to cancer, and we have been friends for over five years now. 

Me with Dawnee and Greg. Dawnee was the assistant director of Mattie's preschool. You should see a trend here, many of my friends in this room got connected to me through Mattie. 

Me with Grace and Mark. Mattie went to preschool with their son, John. 

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Me with Junko and Tad. Mattie went to kindergarten with their son, Kazu. Junko visited me often in the hospital and I will never forget her countless neck and back massages right in the middle of the hospital hallways. 

Me with my friends Mary and Lexi. 

Me with my friends Tanja and Katharina. 

Me with my friends Julie and Jenny. 

Me with my friend Marisa. Marisa has been working with our family since she was in high school. The summer of 2009, she came to our home and played with Mattie, to give us breaks. Now Marisa runs our Foundation bake sales, and has been doing this for ten years. 

Saturday, July 27, 2019

Saturday, July 27, 2019

Tonight's picture was taken on July 29, 2008. Six days after Mattie was diagnosed with cancer. Back then we did not know how to get through a day. We were in total shock and truly devastated at the same time. That day, we took Mattie to Roosevelt Island. A place we all loved and spent a great deal of time at when Mattie was well. We brought Mattie's remote controlled boat to the Island that day, and he played with it in the water. 


Quote of the day: It is good to love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is well done. ~ Vincent Van Gogh

This morning I woke up and looked out the window onto our deck and saw the first blossom of the summer for Ginger Butterfly Lily. We bought this plant in 2014 on one of our trips to North Carolina. Five years later, we still have this plant and it has grown exponentially. 

The plant got its name because the blossoms look like a butterfly! However, what this photo doesn't capture is the intoxicating fragrance coming from the blossoms. The blossoms are short lived and typically don't last for more than a day or so. The fragrance is a mixture of gardenia and lily. 

While outside on the deck smelling Ginger Lily, along came a butterfly! This fellow was fluttering all around us and seemed to hang out by Mattie's bedroom window. 

I spent a good portion of my day glued to the computer, I am not kidding. We are driving to visit Peter's parents on Monday in Boston, so I had lots of things to do for the Foundation before leaving. On top of that, I had to prepare the blog for my upcoming cruise of Canada with my parents. So I worked on twenty days of blogs, in order for them to be prepped for both my Boston and Canada trips. 

Given the work I was doing, Peter suggested we go out to eat today in Dupont Circle. This is how glorious Q street in Dupont Circle looks. Though it was in the 90's today, I enjoyed walking from the restaurant back home. 

We dined at Hank's Oyster Bar. Though I am not an oyster fan, Peter is! So he got his oysters and I got soft shell crabs. A dish that is not for everyone, but I love them. The funny part about all of this is on Facebook this week, two people commented to me that I should write a restaurant and a travel blog. Not sure I could maintain three blogs at once, but I most definitely appreciated the compliments.

Friday, July 26, 2019

Friday, July 26, 2019

Tonight's picture was taken on July 29, 2008. Six days after diagnosis, Mattie had a bone biopsy. A bone biopsy is a procedure in which bone samples are removed (with a special biopsy needle or during surgery) to find out if cancer or other abnormal cells are present. Basically it is the official way of diagnosing osteosarcoma. I am not sure what was worse, the actual procedure (which involved general anesthesia) or the recovery. At home we were asked to remove the bandage. Mattie's skin was so sensitive that pulling something with heavy adhesive off of him was a nightmare. Here you can see that Mattie did not want me touching him. I was sitting next to him on the couch, while he tried taking the bandage off himself. However, I learned quickly over that year's time the fastest way to remove a sticky bandage...... was to use rubbing alcohol. 

Quote of the day: When I was starting out in this business, that was the norm. You did it all. You looked around, and entertainers could dance, sing, play the piano, act, make you laugh. ~ Carol Burnett

Last night we had the treat of seeing Carol Burnett live at the Strathmore theater in Bethesda, Maryland. The theater is beautiful and ironically we have never been to see a show in this venue. I am happy my birthday changed that.
Peter and I grew up on seeing the Carol Burnett show. She has brought family fun to generations of people, and now that her shows are on MeTV (as reruns), a whole new generation is getting to know her. 

The interior of the Strathmore. It reminds me of a smaller version of the Concert Hall at the Kennedy Center. While waiting for the show to begin, we struck up a nice conversation with the couple next to us. 

Keep in mind that Carol Burnett is 86 years old. From a distance it is hard to tell because her voice is strong (she even did her famous Tarzan howl for us), she is quick witted and spry on her feet. She in fact stood for a good portion of the two hour show. 

Like in her 11 year long TV show, last night, she had the lights turned up in the theater and for most of the show, the audience was asking her questions. You may think that would be boring! It could be if you are not Carol Burnett. The audience was firing unrehearsed questions at her and she was providing answers. Answers that illustrated her beautiful personality, well timed humor, and incredible life stories. I think Carol Burnett is a class act, who doesn't need to rely on politics or current events to be funny. She pulls in natural everyday things that we can relate to and does it in a clean and family friendly manner. 

The audience asked her whether she would come back to TV, because her humor is needed now more than ever. She said NO! She told us that the amount of money CBS spent to run the Carol Burnett show back then, would never fly today. In addition, she said the show was not about being perfect, but being real. Which again, would never fly in the very scripted and overly orchestrated TV shows of today. 

Carol Burnett did a tribute to Harvey Korman and Tim Conway. It was touching as she felt her show could never be duplicated, as these two great comedians are no longer alive. She showed us the classic dental skit (click on this photo), and what she told us was that Tim Conway (playing the dentist) went totally off script. As his goal was to get Harvey Korman (the patient) to break down in laughter.

I am glad we saw this incredibly talented living legend perform live!

This afternoon, I met up with my friend, Margy and her husband Ken. They took me out for my birthday. I met Margy on Facebook, through a mutual friend. We have been friends ever since. It is hard to believe that Margy has been diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer in January of 2018. Margy already survived thyroid cancer, worked for many years at a local hospital helping children with cancer, and ran a childhood cancer non-profit for 20 years. So she comes to her second cancer diagnosis with a great deal of insights and experience. To me, her strength and courage are amazing. 

Thursday, July 25, 2019

Thursday, July 25, 2019

Tonight's picture was taken on July 25, 2009. This was my last birthday with Mattie. That day he worked with my in-laws on designing a special card for me. Mattie created a lighthouse birthday pop up for me, as he knew how much I love lighthouses. The lighthouse resembles Bodie Light, which is in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. A place Mattie visited several times. I am sure the first thing you see in this photo is the two of us, but do notice things all around us. Our home looked like an episode of hoarders while Mattie was ill. In fact, it remained looking like this for the entire first year after Mattie died. 


Quote of the day: I love you every day. And now I will miss you every day. ~ Mitch Albom

Peter spoiled me today with flowers, a card, jewelry, an amazing lunch, and tickets to see Carol Burnett live in Maryland tonight. 

I think those who know me well, understand how much I love sunflowers. When Mattie was ill, his care community would deliver me sunflowers whenever I was home. The sunflower became the unofficial symbol to me of Mattie's care team. The sunflower symbolizes love, support, and compassion! 

A line up of many of the cards I was lucky enough to receive. 

My parents gave me this beautiful necklace of diamonds in the shape of a star, the sun, and the moon! It is absolutely perfect and it will always remind me of this moment in time.

Peter surprised me with a second Pandora bracelet. My first bracelet, was given to me by my dear friend Margaret (Mattie's preschool teacher). That bracelet holds many of the charms that symbolize Mattie to me. So it is my Mattie memory bracelet. 

Today's bracelet captures the many places Peter and I have traveled together. It is my travel memory bracelet. I absolutely love it. At the moment: Florida, NYC, Boston, Canada, Washington, DC, North Carolina, Puerto Rico are captured on it. Of course at the center of this bracelet are butterflies! 

We went out for a delicious lunch today. This dress was a gift from my mom. She found a beauty!

I love Fiola Mare. To me it is the best restaurant in the Washington, DC area. The food is amazing! Absolutely beautifully prepared without being over done. In addition to incredible food, their service is like no other in our region. Everyone is extremely well trained and professional. Of course, I also love the view being right on the Potomac River. What is special to me besides the food, service, and ambiance, is the fact that they don't rush you! Dining there is meant to be an experience, like it is in Europe. 

My first course! Eggplant like I never tasted before. 

Peter had a burrata salad. 

Peter then had a king prawn Caesar salad. 

My second course was an heirloom tomato salad. Notice the china. Even that makes the experience special!

Peter had a bouillabaisse for his entree. 

I had an amazing piece of trout. Surrounded by artichokes, which I LOVE. Artichokes remind me of my maternal grandma, who used to cook them for me. I haven't cooked an artichoke since she died. 

Our waiter snapped a photo of us together! Though it was in the 80's, it felt extremely hot out!

Fiola Mare always treats you to a lovely dessert. 

They also give you a birthday greeting from the restaurant!

We grew up on the comedy of Carol Burnett. When I found out she was performing live on my birthday, I felt that was a sign. A sign that we should get tickets. I literally sprung that decision on Peter yesterday afternoon. He made it happen. We got the last two tickets in the theater! 

Wednesday, July 24, 2019

Wednesday, July 24, 2019

Tonight's picture was taken on July 24, 2008. Eleven years ago today! Mattie was diagnosed on July 23, and the next day we had an appointment at MedStar Georgetown University Hospital. There we met Mattie's oncologist and got our first taste of what it would be like working with Jenny and Jessie, the clinic's art therapists. Amazing women! Who got to know Mattie very QUICKLY. In fact that day in clinic he built the boat you see floating in our tub. I will never forget this moment in time and the intense level of stress we were under. So much so, that Peter and I couldn't sleep for days!


Quote of the day: I should know enough about loss to realize that you never really stop missing someone-you just learn to live around the huge gaping hole of their absence. ~ Alyson Noel

Every summer my friend Ann's cousin (JP) from Boston comes to spend time with her. JP has special needs but what I always find when spending time with him is that he is super clued into people. He absorbs what others are saying, how they are feeling, and is a very good judge of character. 

I had the opportunity to take JP out to lunch today! He loves people, interacting with them and don't get me started on food. He is like a bottom less pit, and yet never gains weight. 

While at lunch, JP wanted to write poems about our mutual friends. So he dictated and I did the writing. In between creating poems we text messaged many friends to let them know we were thinking about them. 

This was a poem to our friend Katharina. 

A poem to our friend Catherine. 

No meal is ever complete without dessert. JP was good for it and ate the entire thing! He loves to eat and I am honored he likes to spend time with me.