A Remembrance Video of Mattie

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to me that you take the time to write and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful and help support me through very challenging times. I am forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically have stopped writing on September 9, 2010. However, like my journey with grief there is so much that still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with me, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.


As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki



August 20, 2014

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Tonight's picture was taken in March of 2003. Mattie was 11 months old. We took him to Los Angeles for the first time. Since LA is three hours behind Washington, DC time, this subtle change confused Mattie's sleeping schedule. He was literally up at 4am. Not only up, but raring to go! I was less than thrilled and Peter was a good sport about it. As you can see Peter had a smile on his face! These 4am wake ups happened for a few days until Mattie got used to LA time, and back then I thought this was challenging. But these normal parenting issues paled in comparison to what we later faced when Mattie was diagnosed with cancer. It is unfortunate that we have such comparisons to pull from now. 


Quote of the day: Remember that the most beautiful things in the world are the most useless; peacocks and lilies for instance. ~ John Ruskin


It is ironic that I am posting this photo tonight! Mainly because at 4am this morning I too woke up and in my mind I was ready to start the day. It seemed like it was time to get up to me, except of course it was pitch dark out. So I very much related to exactly how Mattie must have felt in the photo above (totally disoriented to LA time), however, unlike Mattie I was able to go back to sleep! 


My parents and I went out to lunch today and we sat outside in the garden area of a restaurant called, Stanley's. Stanley's has been serving people in the valley since I have been in high school. Needless to say, that is a long time! I remember going to this restaurant with friends of mine, however, at that time, the restaurant had NO garden patio! Check out the beautiful symbols hanging on the wall of the patio?!! Wonderful Mattie suns. They caught my attention today most likely because I was sitting facing them directly! The patio also has a fountain. If Mattie were with us, he would be sticking close to the fountain, playing in the water. Mattie wasn't into eating, as he was into checking out his environment and playing in it. Of course Mattie would be 12 years old now, so I can't even imagine what it would be like going to a restaurant with him as a pre-teen! In my mind Mattie will always be seven years old and a little boy playing with Legos. 

I am signing off for tonight! More tomorrow. I find that I am very tired from writing and from time spent at a computer this summer. I am headed to a museum exhibit tomorrow, so I am sure I will have commentary to report!

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