Sunday, May 12, 2024Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2007. We took Mattie to Tower Oaks Lodge in Rockville, MD for Mother's Day brunch. As Peter was snapping the photo, he asked Mattie to show how he feels about me. As you can see, Mattie crossed his arms over his heart, to signify that he loved me. I remember this moment in time like it were yesterday. If anyone would have told me what would happen to my life in both 2009 and 2023, I would never have believed them. In my wildest imagination, I never thought Mattie would get cancer and die. Similarly if someone would have told me that Peter would leave me in the future, I would have laughed. None of these things seemed like possibilities. Frankly, I am not sure I will ever accept either occurrence in my life. As you might imagine, Mother's Day is a hard day for me. Now without Peter, the day is down right impossible, because it feels like I have lost another piece of Mattie, my identity as a wife and mom, and the ability to keep Mattie's memory and legacy alive with my husband.
Quote of the day: When we miss someone often, what we really miss is the part of us that with this someone awakens. ~ Luigina Sgarro
Years ago, Mattie created this lovely fountain for me with Peter. It was a Mother's Day gift they surprised me with. When Mattie died, we started a new tradition.... on Mother's Day this fountain would get turned on for the season in memory of Mattie. This tradition died when we moved into our house. Seeing this photo is actually quite painful for me on every level. It symbolizes tremendous loss. We took some photos with our family friends on Friday and Saturday. This is me with Ronee. In 1984, in celebration of my high school graduation, I went on a European teen tour with Ronee. She was my tour leader. My mom and Ronee's husband were teachers together in NY. So they have known me since I was five years old. Friday's dinner!Saturday morning, our neighbor, Judi came over. Judi snapped this photo of us! Seeing this photo reminds me how much I love our kitchen. For years, when living in the city, my kitchen was the size of a closet. When looking for a house, I wanted the kitchen to be bright and spacious, because to me it is the most important room in the house! In fact the whole house has beautiful natural light, regardless of whether the sun is out or not. Ronee and Eugene reminded me this weekend that our house is special and they understand why I fell in love with it in 2021. Despite how I feel about the day, I took my parents out to brunch. We go to the same restaurant every Sunday, and when we got to our table, Cheryl (our wonderful server) had Mother's Day gifts awaiting us! The restaurant had a few specials today and I happen to love soft shell crabs, so this was a treat. My mom!My dad and me!One of the gifts Cheryl gave me! Symbolic of my Mattie, as all butterflies are Mattie gifts.
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