Tonight's picture was taken in October of 2006. Mattie was four an a half years old and that weekend we took him to Walkersville, to ride on a special rail car. The ride took us through the country side of Maryland. Though it was cold outside, Mattie and Peter spent a good portion of the ride in the outside car. Don't you just love Mattie's smile?
Quote of the day: Grief is like a long valley, a winding valley where any bend may reveal a totally new landscape…. there is something new to be chronicled every day. ~ CS Lewis
Today was a winner of a day. I took my mom to physical therapy. For the most part there is a night and day experience for me as the caregiver, between my dad's PT sessions and my mom's. My dad's PT is very collaborative. She always greets me, wants to know how the week is going, whether I have any observations, and will ask me outright..... what I feel we need to work on this week. I absolutely love her. She has great energy, is very knowledgeable, and has a way to motivate my dad to get moving.
My mom's therapist never addresses me, and never asks my perspective. Of course that doesn't stop me from giving it. Today she was doing another re-evaluation of my mom, in order to qualify for more therapy. So my mom needs to show progress in order for Medicare to continue funding these sessions. My mom initially went to this therapist for neck pain and posture. So I agree, my mom has made great progress with these two issues. However, I have deep concerns about my mom's balance and ability to walk safely. When the therapist asked my mom about balance and walking, my mom said she was doing great. There was NO WAY I could sit through this assessment and not speak up.
So I did! I explained to the therapist that my mom is doing better but I have concerns. I also felt that once my mom sees the neurologist, she may qualify for more therapy. The physical therapist did not agree with me and also told me that she is working with my mom on balance and walking. Yes true, she has begun to do this, but this hasn't been the focus of therapy over the last two months. Needless to say I felt that the therapist dismissed me and is also not helping me come up with solutions. I am the one caring for my mom 24/7, the therapist isn't! I would hope my insights and observations would be important.
I think the therapist is afraid of my mom. Because I pressed the issue today, she discussed the idea of walking with an assisted device. Specifically a walker. My mom wanted none of this and again I confronted my mom in session. I told her in front of the therapist, that the therapist wasn't telling my mom what we all are seeing, but that I am concerned and she needs to listen. We then moved to video taping my mom, so she could see how she walks both alone and with a walker. To me this is vital as my mom has lost most insights into herself and abilities. I frankly think suggesting a walker to my mom was like hitting her from left field. Specifically since the therapist never said at any point over all these months that my mom needed assistance! Why not start with a cane? My mom is not interested in any assisted device and the therapist knows this, so having my mom use a walker in the session was revealing. Revealing with how out of touch this therapist is!
After the session was over, I had an absolute meltdown in the car. I am so overwhelmed caring for both parents and the last thing I need is a therapist who doesn't understand the situation! She thinks my mom is doing great! I suggest she come over and spend a day with us. Some professionals have a way of making the caregiver feel like they are going crazy! I was left feeling like I am the one with the problem. Yet I know FULL well the issue doesn't lie with me, I am working 110% here and I should have the right to be part of the treatment team.
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