Tonight's picture was taken in February of 2006. Mattie was almost four years old. This was a typical sighting in our living room. Mattie loved building and creating and he especially loved these colorful tinker toys. I don't know if you can see the little doll house on our coffee table, but this belonged to Mattie. We were in Target one day and he saw this on the shelf and requested it. It was pink and purple and though some may have deemed it a "girl toy," I figured Mattie could learn and develop from this form of creativity. He loved it!
Quote of the day: I guess you don’t really own a dog, you rent them, and you have to be thankful that you had a long lease. ~ Joe Garagiola
At 7am, I looked outside my door, and found these three bags were left by the garage. Yes I ordered them, but I wasn't excited about lifting three 44lb bags of salt into the house and lugging them to the basement. These salt pellets are needed for our water filtration/softening system. I assure you 44 pounds of salt seems to weigh a ton. Given the many falls I have had lately, I knew I had to be careful taking on the weight of these bags. I did it slowly and smartly. I wish I could say that was the end of lifting today. But more boxes came in the evening.
I am very grateful that two of my friends read last night's blog posting and then wrote to me today. Basically they gave me a reality check that I have nothing to feel guilty about regarding my parents and my mom's comment about her lack of happiness. My friends helped me to see that the care I provide my parents daily for over two years, is extraordinary and in their words most adult children would have institutionalized parents with such great needs. I am working hard to prevent that from happening, but I can attest to the fact that this isn't easy and it is a sacrifice. But a sacrifice I would hope that my Mattie would have made for me too.
Since today was a holiday, both of my parents had physical therapy at home. My dad had his hour long session at 11am, and my mom had her session at 12:15pm. So it felt like a busy morning of juggling appointments, but while my parents were in their sessions, I was able to do some Foundation work.
I then took them out for frozen yogurt later in the afternoon and then came home to deal with laundry and cooked, served, and cleaned up dinner. My goal is to help my dad regain weight. He has lost 11 pounds in three months and his appetite is waning. Which is why I have now integrated bread and jam in his nightly dinner. He loves bread and he never turns it down.
Just when I think I can sit down and get some work done, four or five other issues pop up that derail me (all around my parents' health insurance). In the beginning, when my parents moved in, these types of fire drills were innerving. Now I just expect them to happen, as with their dementia, everything is a catastrophe. I am sure this is because their memory is fleeting, if things aren't addressed right then and there, they won't remember them. Truthfully watching and observing my parents makes me nervous. Nervous for my own future, as now I face it alone.
Some days I can take what I am dealing with and try to absorb it, other days, I am just too overwhelmed and push away the reality, in order to get through a very long day. All I know is it takes a great deal of patience, strength, stamina, and the ability to think beyond one's self to care for a loved one with physical and cognitive impairments day in and day out.
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