Monday, November 5, 2012Tonight's picture was taken in October of 2008. I know that this photo must have been taken on a Friday, given the activity we were doing. We were out in the Pediatric Unit hallway enjoying an experiment hosted by the Georgetown University Chemistry Club. I was kneeling between Mattie and Brandon (Mattie's big buddy). The other person in the picture holding the blue container of dry ice was Chris. Chris was the Chemistry Club president and really tried hard to engage Mattie during his visits. That day, Chris gave each of us a red rose. You can see Mattie holding his rose, while I am dipping my rose into the dry ice. Literally after a few seconds in dry ice, this rose became a popsicle. Once I pulled the rose out of the dry ice, Chris directed me to throw it on the floor. The rose shattered in hundreds of pieces, not unlike a piece of glass. When I looked at this photo tonight, it jogged my memory. Mattie loved the rose so much, that he refused to dip it in dry ice. He wanted to hold it and take it back to his room. Keep in mind that flowers and plants are not allowed in a PICU. But having the opportunity to hold something living was special to Mattie. He may not have verbally expressed it, but in essence that was what he was saying by refusing to use his rose in the experiment.
Quote of the day: Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of human change. Kindness that catches us by surprise brings out the best in our natures. ~ Bob Kerrey
I think there is a lot to be said for unexpected kindness. Kindness that is given without a motive or expectation for something in return. We see glimmers of this type of kindness around us on a daily basis, but I am not sure we acknowledge it. Or accept it for how beautiful it is. Last night I received an email from my friend Karen, who lives in NY. Karen is a NYC high school math teacher, not unlike my mother. In fact, if you ask Karen why she became a teacher, she will say she was inspired by my mom. My mom was an outstanding math teacher, she challenged her students, and many of them went on to college and to accomplish great things.
We live in a screwed up society where teachers are taken for granted and are not compensated appropriately for the jobs that they do daily. Many of Karen's students have been greatly impacted by Hurricane Sandy. Her stories are horrible and depressing, because children this age should not be worried about clothes, food, and where they will live next. Forget how they will get to school or even if they will attend school, right now they are dealing with the most basic of needs..... safety and food. Karen could have spent the day yesterday at home preparing for school to start today. After all, school has been out for a week because of the storm's devastation. But instead, she went to different clothing stores and other establishments around town asking for item donations to give to her students today. The school did not ask her to do this and clearly she would receive no compensation for doing this. Her actions to me speak to unexpected kindness, and I have no doubt that providing these surprises to her students brought out the best in both of them. I know from personal experience that the educators who had the most impact on my life were those who went beyond their lesson plans in the classroom. Teaching and transforming young lives requires a personal investment, and I can't think of a better way for students to know that their teacher cares about them than by receiving needed items at a time of crisis.
As for myself, I had several different lows today. However, in the midst of this, I received an email from a friend inviting me to a party, and also letting me know that a portion of the proceeds from the jewelry that would be sold at this party would go to Mattie Miracle. This was a complete surprise to me, an unexpected kindness. To me these unexpected kindnesses are what makes life special, what makes us feel human and connected, and on difficult days, an unexpected kindness can help change one's entire perspective. May we all be the recipients of unexpected kindness as well as feel the joy of giving this surprise to someone else.
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