Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2005. Mattie was three years old and loved this rocking duck. This duck belonged to Peter when he was a child, so it experienced two generations of 'Brown' boys! This duck is still in our living room, right where Mattie left it. I would imagine most parents donate their child's items or hand them down to others to use. When you lose a child, it is as if your life and time stops. Giving your child's items away seems unnatural because in this case things do make the connection more real.
Quote of the day: Behind every exquisite thing that existed, there was something tragic. ~ Oscar Wilde
When I arrived at Mattie's school today, I had my hands full. This is not unusual, carrying bags and art supplies. Just carrying things from the parking lot to the classroom is a feat. I have done it numerous times before, without anyone helping me. But today was different. As I was doing the balancing act of bags, canvases, and even a vase filled with sunflowers (for the still life hands on project tomorrow), a young boy ran over to the school door to hold it open for me. When I walked through the door, I had to put the vase down because it was all too heavy. With that, the young fellow could have walked away, but he didn't. He offered to help me and he literally carried the flowers and vase all the way to the classroom. As he said to me..... "the vase with flowers is TOO heavy to carry with one hand!" On our walk, I learned that he is a fourth grader and thought my flowers were very pretty. He was adorable, and as I entered Donna's classroom, she clearly knew this fellow. Any case this fourth grader made an impression on me, because typically it has been my experience that most children do not offer to help me, hold open a door, or even stop what they are doing to observe the needs of another person.
Two weeks ago when I was at Mattie's school, Mattie's memorial tree was just beginning to bud after a long barren winter. Today the tree was all unfurled! It was happy, very green, and wearing all its ornaments with pride. The twinkling tree (as I call it because of all the wonderful trinkets and wind chime it has on it) is growing and stands tall watching over the playground. On a regular basis, I see children playing near or around the tree, and to them this is just an ordinary tree, whereas to me this tree is anything but ordinary! Instead it symbolizes the life of a courageous seven year old who lost his battle to cancer.
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