Mattie Miracle 9th Annual Walk & Family Festival -- Raised over $97,000

Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation Promotional Video

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to us that you take the time to write to us and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful to us and help support us through very challenging times. To you we are forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically stop writing on September 9, 2010. However, at the moment, I feel like our journey with grief still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with us, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.

As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki and Peter

The Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation celebrates its 7th anniversary!

The Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation was created in the honor of Mattie.

We are a 501(c)(3) Public Charity. We are dedicated to increasing childhood cancer awareness, education, advocacy, research and psychosocial support services to children, their families and medical personnel. Children and their families will be supported throughout the cancer treatment journey, to ensure access to quality psychosocial and mental health care, and to enable children to cope with cancer so they can lead happy and productive lives. Please visit the website at: and take some time to explore the site.

We have only gotten this far because of people like yourself, who have supported us through thick and thin. So thank you for your continued support and caring, and remember:

.... Let's Make the Miracle Happen and Stomp Out Childhood Cancer!

A Remembrance Video of Mattie

Random Shots of Mattie, Family and Friends

May 23, 2013

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Tonight's picture was taken in May of 2009, at the Mattie March. In the photo with Mattie are Ariel and Tess. Both of these women were students of mine. In fact, Ariel went on to become a pediatric nurse and now works in a well known hospital in NYC. I am very proud of her and the profession she chose. Both Ariel and Tess worked with Mattie at the March to help him create a Mother's Day gift for me. This was the last Mother's Day gift I ever received. Mattie made me a beautiful card and decorated a bag for me. All things I kept and mean a lot to me.

Quote of the day: Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect. ~ Margaret Mitchell

This afternoon my parents and I visited Mattie's favorite restaurant for lunch. When Mattie was in preschool, we used to take Mattie to this restaurant quite often after school. We frequented this restaurant so often that we got to know the manager of the restaurant and eventually Becca, the executive chef (the wonderful person who donates and cooks all our food at each Foundation Walk!). Though Peter and I visit this restaurant quite frequently now on the weekends, the manager we know only works during the week. So in essence we haven't seen him in a LONG time! Today when we walked into the restaurant, we immediately saw Mike. Despite not seeing each other in ages, he knew exactly who we were. We are not the only patrons who have fallen in love with Mike. He is a people person, cares about his diners, and makes you feel special. I recall how special he always made Mattie feel when he was healthy, and I most especially remember how kind he was to Mattie when he was battling cancer and in a wheelchair. He treated Mattie like a "normal" kid, engaged him in conversation, and always gave him a toy to play with. This of course was when Mattie was well enough to go out into public spaces. As Mattie's treatment continued, he became more and more remote so that interacting with people became almost non-existent.

We can not visit Mike's restaurant without thinking of Mattie. We practically sat in almost every booth within the restaurant when Mattie was alive and whenever I pass the pond with the koi outside, I pause. Mattie is no longer alive, but his presence exists for all of us at this restaurant. Seeing Mike today just exacerbated that feeling for me!

As Margaret Mitchell said, "life is under NO obligation to give us what we expect." I never expected to give birth to a baby and then lose him seven years later to cancer. I do not think anyone could have possibly prepared me for this reality! I had the expectation that I would see Mattie go to school, make friends, participate in school events, graduate, have a girlfriend, get married, and the list goes on. None of these expectations will ever be met and frankly it gives me no comfort knowing that as Mattie's classmates graduate from elementary school next week, that Mattie's name will be mentioned, or that his classmates may say a reflection about him during graduation. From my perspective these are all niceties, niceties that will not bring Mattie back, and in many ways the whole notion of graduation incenses me. I freely admit that I can not be mature about this nor can I appreciate that others are graduating, that others are maturing, growing up, and moving onto middle school. For me, I am trapped in kindergarten and most likely that is where my heart and mind will remain.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi same Holton girl u talked about on Wed. This morning I had to get to school early and could not comment. At Holton we graduate at 6th grade I know how u feel. Are u ok.