Mattie's Blog and his Fight Against Osteosarcoma

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to me that you take the time to write and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful and help support me through very challenging times. I am forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically have stopped writing on September 9, 2010. However, like my journey with grief there is so much that still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with me, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.

As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki

March 20, 2019

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Tonight's picture was taken in March of 2004. Mattie was almost two years old and was full of life and energy. Mattie loved being outdoors, regardless of the weather. As you can see he was headed outside onto our deck and saw I was trying to take a photo. I believe Mattie probably was reaching for the door knob to prevent the photo from taking place. Mattie was typically compliant with my photo documentation needs, but there were times this did not fit into his plan.

Quote of the day: Calcification is the hardening of body tissues by calcium salts or deposits. Although calcification itself is not considered a disease, it has been shown to be a significant contributing factor in nearly every known illness and aging condition, including heart disease, kidney stones, gallstones, chronic inflammation, arthritis, cancers, cataracts, eczema, psoriasis, and even wrinkles. ~ David Wolfe

My day did not go as expected. I called my doctor back this morning as he suggested. Needless to say, when he heard I was still in pain and the stone hasn't passed, he encouraged me to keep my surgery appointment for tomorrow. Especially since we are going away next week for Mattie's birthday. He made enough of a case to me, that I conceded to have the surgery. Basically I had to accept that my quality of life right now is awful and the pain has exhausted me. I also remember my other urologist telling me that this is the best person in the area to do the kind of surgery I needed. Therefore, I do not want to be away from DC and need an emergency surgery with another doctor.

So at 6am tomorrow, I report to the hospital. I am having in essence three things done: 1) a ureteroscopy, to catch and remove the kidney stone in my ureter, 2) laser lithotripsy (is a procedure to break apart kidney stones in the urinary tract. It is done with a ureteroscope passed into the tubes of the urinary tract. The laser breaks the kidney stones into smaller pieces that can either be removed by the surgeon or pass out of the body in the urine.) and 3) the insertion of a stent which I will have in me for a week. I included more information below in case you are interested.

I am preparing myself for several rough days after surgery. As I have heard the stent is very uncomfortable and leaves you with the sensation of needing frequent bathroom trips. Which isn't far off from what I am feeling right now.