Mattie Miracle 9th Annual Walk & Family Festival -- Raised over $97,000

Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation Promotional Video

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to us that you take the time to write to us and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful to us and help support us through very challenging times. To you we are forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically stop writing on September 9, 2010. However, at the moment, I feel like our journey with grief still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with us, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.

As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki and Peter

The Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation celebrates its 7th anniversary!

The Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation was created in the honor of Mattie.

We are a 501(c)(3) Public Charity. We are dedicated to increasing childhood cancer awareness, education, advocacy, research and psychosocial support services to children, their families and medical personnel. Children and their families will be supported throughout the cancer treatment journey, to ensure access to quality psychosocial and mental health care, and to enable children to cope with cancer so they can lead happy and productive lives. Please visit the website at: and take some time to explore the site.

We have only gotten this far because of people like yourself, who have supported us through thick and thin. So thank you for your continued support and caring, and remember:

.... Let's Make the Miracle Happen and Stomp Out Childhood Cancer!

A Remembrance Video of Mattie

Random Shots of Mattie, Family and Friends

June 25, 2012

Monday, June 25, 2012

Monday, June 25, 2012

Tonight's picture was taken in June of 2004. Mattie was in our living room, and was playing with Mr. Potato Head. However, as you can see the yellow glasses did not land up on their rightful owner (Mr. Potato Head) but on Mattie instead. Mattie loved the many different combinations of creatures he could make with Mr. Potato Head's body. The funny part about Mattie's creations were that they did not always mimic reality. For example, some of his creatures had legs and arms coming out of their heads!

Quote of the day: May I live this day compassionate of heart, clear in word, gracious in awareness, courageous in thought, generous in love. ~ John O'Donohue

I remained at home all day today since we had some work being done there. Staying at home at times can make me feel stir crazy, but lately I have found I feel quite the opposite. Leaving home takes great motivation, as does wanting to interact with others.

While at home, I decided to order something we needed on-line. Once I completed the transaction, another screen popped up asking me to take the store's customer survey. The survey did not take very long, but one of the identifying questions on the survey asked me to indicate how many children I have. This was a multiple choice question, with various options to select from. Of course there was NO right option for me. After all, I couldn't indicate I have a 10 year old living in my home, despite the fact, that if Mattie were alive he would be that age. So the only option that made sense for me given the context of this survey, was that I have NO children. Though Mattie has been gone from our lives for two years now, this is the first time I have been faced with such a multiple choice question. No matter how I would have answered it, the feelings that arise from the response are just not good.

Loss causes a person to redefine one's self, one's interest, one's priorities, and one's outlook about the future. I have talked to many moms who have lost a child to cancer, and for all of us, I think the consensus is that the lost child is always a part of us and our family, yet depending upon the social or professional context we are in or whom we are talking to, this can alter the information we wish to divulge. For example, when I am out shopping, and  I open up my wallet to pay for an item, I have had people comment about my wallet pictures of Mattie. Naturally the store clerks have absolutely no idea that such a healthy looking child could possibly have gotten cancer and then died. But answering their questions at times is hard, because I have found given the circumstances, the nature of the interaction, and who is around us, my answer will be different. Either the answer will be short and sweet, acknowledging that this is a picture of my son, and at other times, the answer is much more detailed and explicit. Naturally I could remove Mattie's pictures  from my wallet altogether, so that such a chance occurrence and interaction doesn't occur, but in my mind I would be removing the pictures for the wrong reasons. I decided a while ago that Mattie's pictures were staying, and if they make others uncomfortable and ill at ease, then I simply can't take ownership for their feelings. Childhood cancer is a fact, it exists and tears up families. If Mattie's pictures enable others to learn more about the disease's prevalence and impact, then I would say these pictures not only have a special meaning to me but ultimately to others. My hunch is parents of healthy children look at these photos and say..... "I am lucky this isn't happening to my children!" Indeed!!!! If you have a healthy child, you in essence have received one of life's greatest gifts.

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