Tonight's picture was taken in April of 2005, during Mattie's third birthday party! That year we had a Blue's Clues themed party, as Mattie loved that blue TV character. We had all sorts of fun at the party and a student of mine even came and did a magic show, which included a white bunny named Hobbes.
Quote of the day: A truly strong person does not need the approval of others any more than a lion needs the approval of sheep. ~ Vernon Howard
It was another early morning, as both of my parents had appointments with the cardiologist. I like this doctor, he answers all our questions, and allows us all in the same room with each other. This way I can easily participate in both appointments. After the appointment, I mailed things for the Foundation, and picked up mail. Then took my parents out to lunch. I have to admit today wasn't my finest hour. I chalk it up to exhaustion and having no freedom. My dad can ask the same questions over and over. Minutes apart! Most times, I calmly answer him, but today I was in no mood. My respond was snappy and his response was equally unstable. As he slammed the table and started cursing. Some people maybe intimidated by that, but that only fuels my anger. At times I have to remind my parents that the average child wouldn't be able to manage this day to day dysfunction.
This morning I did my usual. I got myself up, showered, dressed and made breakfast. Then I went to get my dad up, showered, and dressed. We all had breakfast together and then I handed him one of his activity books. Today was word finding. Because I wanted to cut up melons and pineapple (fruits by parents eat for breakfast), I handed the book to my dad and asked him to get started while I was working (something I don't typically do, but I wanted to get some things done before leaving the house). I focused on cutting fruit and minutes later I turned to look at my dad and he was sleeping at the breakfast table. He had pushed the workbook aside. I woke him up and asked what was going on. He told me he finished the exercises, which I knew was NOT possible. So I glanced at the word find puzzle and noticed he did NOTHING. Not one word. I asked him to explain what was going on and how come he did not do any of the brain exercises, yet told me he did. This is NOT a memory issue, this is an attitude issue. The combination of memory and attitude together drive me up the wall some days.
So unless I sit with him and walk him through these exercises, he won't do any of them. Which leads me to question who is this benefitting???? I don't need brain exercises, and the only one getting frustrated is me. He has NO desire to do anything, to learn anything, to be engaged with anything. Today was NOT a day I could absorb that, as it takes a great deal of emotional energy to cope with this day in and day out. I remind my dad constantly what his cardiologist says.... Use it or Lose it! This applies to his physical and cognitive state! Yet the only one who wants him to walk, do his exercises, engage with his brain activities is me! I need to regroup and usually that means I take Sunny for a walk. But it continues to rain, pouring actually, and need to find another outlet on days like today.
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