Friday, November 30, 2012Tonight's picture was taken in November of 2007. We took Mattie to Roosevelt Island and what we did not realize was Peter was taking photos of us while we were walking. Funny how we really don't appreciate these simple moments in our lives until we don't have them anymore. I can't say this LOUDLY enough and it is my hope that my readers will learn from my experiences and appreciate the little ones in your lives. Their presence is not always guaranteed.
Quote of the day: The whole world can become the enemy when you lose what you love. ~ Kristina McMorris
There is a great deal of truth in tonight's quote. When dealing with grief it can seem like no one else around you quite gets it, and therefore when you feel misunderstood it is easy to interpret everything and everyone around you as the enemy. It has been a challenging week for me physically, and unfortunately it isn't getting any better. In addition to my severe headaches I now have another recurrent physical issue with my bladder. So I am not in the best of moods right now.
This afternoon, I literally got into bed and watched a Hallmark Movie. It may not be of any surprise to my readers to find out that this is one of my favorite channels on TV. I love the movies because of the stories, the meaningful connections, and usually the moral messages. I must admit that Christmas is not a time of year that brings me any happiness or joy. I suspect that is true for so many others for various reasons. But trying to define this holiday for us when Mattie is no longer in our lives becomes deeply challenging. Despite not liking the holidays, I do like watching holiday movies on Hallmark. I am not sure why, but I suspect because the movies usually have characters in them who like myself are lost, confused, and try to shut out aspects of the holidays.
This evening, I watched a movie from 2010, entitled "Cancel Christmas." The title got to me immediately. The movie stars Judd Nelson, who I can't help but associate with the 1980s "brat pack" (which was a group I didn't care for at all). Nonetheless, Judd Nelson and the two young boys starring in the movie delivered a powerful message. The movie begins with the Christmas Board of Directors (not saying this is all based on reality) issuing an ultimatum to Santa and his favorite elf. The ultimatum is that in 30 days or less, Santa has to make Christmas less commercial and material, or lose it forever. Santa's test that he has to pass in order to save Christmas is to change the hearts of two privileged kids and one child living with a disability so that they all understand the true meaning of Christmas.
Interwoven within the movie was a glimpse in the lives of two families shattered apart by the death of a parent. Neither family wanted to celebrate the holidays or even knew how to connect with each other anymore. This distance and disillusionment are further compounded with the materialism of Christmas. The movie pointed out that people enjoy the holiday because of the gifts they receive. So Santa begins to change the thinking of children immediately when they visit him at the mall. Instead of asking them what they want for Christmas, he asks the children what they are getting their parents for Christmas. He then goes on to explain how special and what a good feeling it is knowing you made someone else happy and feel appreciated. One child tells Santa that he has no money to give his parents a gift. Santa then corrects the child and says that the best gifts are those that aren't bought, and suggests that the child gives the gift of cleaning for a week, doing the dishes for two weeks, or hugs for a month, etc!
I have always despised the pressure we put upon ourselves at Christmas. The need and expectations of gift giving truly needs to be re-evaluated. Which is why I think this movie touched my heart. Because at the end of the day, Santa did pass his test, and the three children in question learned that doing a good deed, listening to a friend, and giving of one's time and heart are the true gifts and meaning of Christmas. Yet we live in such a busy society where people have little to NO time for each other, and therefore this message falls on deaf ears. But at the end of the day, I am pretty sure that no one is going to remember the gift you gave them this holiday season, however, a kind deed and an unexpected offer of help and concern are gifts that are cherished for a lifetime.
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