Mattie Miracle Walk 2023 was a $131,249 success!

Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation Promotional Video

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to us that you take the time to write to us and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful to us and help support us through very challenging times. To you we are forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically stop writing on September 9, 2010. However, at the moment, I feel like our journey with grief still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with us, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.


As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki and Peter



The Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation celebrates its 7th anniversary!

The Mattie Miracle Cancer Foundation was created in the honor of Mattie.

We are a 501(c)(3) Public Charity. We are dedicated to increasing childhood cancer awareness, education, advocacy, research and psychosocial support services to children, their families and medical personnel. Children and their families will be supported throughout the cancer treatment journey, to ensure access to quality psychosocial and mental health care, and to enable children to cope with cancer so they can lead happy and productive lives. Please visit the website at: www.mattiemiracle.com and take some time to explore the site.

We have only gotten this far because of people like yourself, who have supported us through thick and thin. So thank you for your continued support and caring, and remember:

.... Let's Make the Miracle Happen and Stomp Out Childhood Cancer!

A Remembrance Video of Mattie

December 2, 2012

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Sunday, December 2, 2012


Tonight's picture was taken in December of 2008. Mattie was home recovering from his second limb salvaging surgery. I took this picture because to me it screamed out HOPE! Mattie had three out of four limbs operated on and therefore he had a hard time doing anything independently like walking, dressing, feeding, and toileting. This was very frustrating for a once capable six year old. In addition to all of Mattie's disabilities, there was great fear associated with trying to walk independently, not to mention pain. Last night I posted a photo of Mattie playing the piano. Tonight's photo was next in the sequence. Once Mattie finished playing on the piano, he actually hobbled his way from the piano to the staircase. To me this photo spoke to Mattie's courage and his desire to want to walk again. I had no idea when this photo was taken that Mattie would never get a chance to rehabilitate.


Quote of the day: Remembering. Forgetting. I'm not sure which is worse. ~ Kelley Armstrong


Peter and I have had a challenging weekend. We had a great deal of Foundation work to do to prepare for our December mass mailing. However, the issue at hand was my physical decline. I am fortunate to some extent that I have access to several of my doctors by email. So last night I emailed my urologist. When she heard my symptoms, she instructed me to contact the oncologist who is following my case since February. I wasn't expecting that response, so naturally this made me very upset and only compounded my stress. Though it is Sunday, I worked hard at getting an appointment to see one of my doctors tomorrow morning.

Moments like this make us reflect on all the times we waited on pins and needles with Mattie. What would his scans show? Was the chemotherapy working? Has the cancer spread to his lungs? Would Mattie's pain ever dissipate? Would his appetite ever come back? All a lot of what ifs, for 15 straight months during Mattie's battle! A great deal of stress and anxiety were wrapped into each of these 'what if' moments! The stress and the aftermath of it remain within me, so much so that I have noticed when I am now asked to face things I perceive as stressful, a whole chain reaction unfolds.

So now that I have been told I need to see my oncologist again this week, I have a hard time separating this news from the news that hit us with Mattie. I  have no doubt that the stress of not knowing what is going on with my health further compounds my headaches. I am signing off for tonight and hope that tomorrow provides more answers rather than more questions.
 

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