Tonight's picture was taken on Christmas of 2008. That was a hard day for all of us. We were home from the hospital and were alone. Which was a night and day difference from living in the hospital. In the hospital there was constant noise and people around us 24/7. When we were home we had more privacy but then again we also had NO physical or emotional support. Mattie was in a very depressed and anxious state that day. One of Mattie's friends sent us these Christmas hats and noses and Peter decided to put some on which inspired Mattie. They posed for a photo on Mattie's hospital bed, which was in our living room. However, what you see here was probably our most happy moment that day.
Quote of the day: Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. ~ Marcel Proust
This morning I felt like I was Mrs. Danvers in Daphne Du Maurier's book, Rebecca (also a Hitchcock movie). For those of you unfamiliar with Mrs. Danvers, she was the ultimate snoop. She knew exactly what was going on inside and outside of a home. I wasn't purposefully snooping this morning, rather I was a sun seeker. I went outside of my parent's house and stood on the front lawn in the sun for the few minutes. To me being in the sun for short periods of time just makes me feel good. While standing around looking at the vegetation and mountains, an old car drove by, down the street, turned around and parked across the street at a neighbor's house. The person in the car was an older gentleman, who opened up the driver side door and began to stare at me. We had a staring contest for five minutes. I wasn't moving and he wasn't getting out of his car! When he did emerge from his car, we was dressed oddly for a warm day. He was wearing a wool hat, covering plenty of his hair! He opened his trunk and took out a large burlap sack. If he was portly and had a red suit on, I swear he could have been Santa Claus! But this Santa looked dazed and confused and I did not understand why he was carrying a big sack. Any case, he proceeded up the neighbor's front walk way. He mulled around a bit, dropped the sack and then crossed over the driveway and was looking over a gate into the backyard. He popped the latch on the backyard gate and walked in. I found his behavior beyond odd especially since he kept walking back and forth. Not getting into the house but walking in circles.
I told my parents about this character and we wrote down his license plate number, tried calling the neighbor's cell phone, and then proceeded to call the security company for the neighborhood. Literally within seconds a patrol car was in front of the house and I came out to talk with the officer. I told him what I observed and that he could find "skinny Santa" (if you know me well, I have a nick name for practically everyone in my life) in the backyard. The officer did find the burlap sack by the front door and told me clothing was inside! It all checked out in the end, because he was our neighbor's father, but he was disoriented and did not know how to get into the house. He did not know where the key was and I guess he was watching the house while his son was away. Any case, the officer thanked me for taking this seriously, calling him, and agreed with me that the man seemed questionable and appeared disoriented. Now I could have just let this all go, but what if something was wrong in the end? I would have felt terrible for keeping it quiet!
This afternoon we all went out to lunch. My dad had some medical tests today, so we discussed them, and we got a better understanding for some of the issues he has been dealing with. Dialoguing is important and I think it is vital for family members to all be on the same page about medical issues so that we can ultimately advocate for what is in the best interest of the patient.
Peter and I are both dealing with our own lows. It is rather ironic that we are on separate coasts now but we are both feeling the lows. We hadn't discussed them until today, but as soon as we did we both got it right away. Both of us went on Facebook recently. I must confess, I rarely visit Facebook. I only do on occasion to post about the Foundation or to check on my friend in cancer. Otherwise, I have learned for survival purposes, I try to limit my exposure. But today I went on to look at a few friends' pages. After five minutes I had to STOP!!! I was getting super depressed, then angry, which then moved to intense bitterness. I just can't process these cutesy photos of friends, family, happy moments, and other holiday gatherings. It turns out that Peter had a similar experience yesterday which sent him into a funk. So we both agreed, no Facebook during the holidays. I think it is rather a sad commentary. Facebook is designed to keep people connected and to share things between friends and family. Whereas to me Facebook is a social media tool that highlights exactly what we are missing and flaunts it in our faces minute by minute, hourly, and daily.
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