Tonight's picture was taken in June of 2007. That weekend we took Mattie to Pennsylvania, to visit Dutch Wonderland. An amusement park geared toward smaller kids. Mattie had an absolute ball and tried every ride possible with Peter. I was fascinated by this big slide, but there was no way I was going on it! Fortunately Peter likes this kind of stuff, and I was always happy to be the family photographer! Ironically when Mattie first started preschool, he did not like slides at all. But over time, he came to appreciate them, so much so, that he was able to go on this huge slide.
Quote of the day: We don’t remember days, we remember moments. ~ Cesare Pavese
My day started at 5am. I heard my mom's alarm go off (yes she sets it for 5am everyday, and don't ask me WHY) and at the same time, Sunny was in my bedroom pacing. I knew exactly what that meant, especially since there were NO storms. The chemo is wrecking havoc on his stomach and causing him to need the bathroom at all hours. Typically Peter carries Sunny down our staircase, as Sunny can get up the stairs, but because of his age, is unable to get down the stairs. Not so much a problem when Peter is home, but now that he is in Boston, I had to get Sunny down the stairs myself.
Sunny is 65+ pounds. Fortunately I have a harness that straps around his front and back end. I got this harness from Sunny's physical therapist, when he was recovering from his knee surgeries. Thank goodness for the harness. I literally had to carry him down the stairs in the harness. Sunny won't help me, as he is deathly afraid of going down the stairs, but I knew he had to go outside, so I have no idea how I managed 65 pounds down the stairs, but I did it. I left Sunny outside in the backyard from 5-7am, because I had to go back to sleep. I am just too exhausted and frankly could sleep a month.
I have been able to coax Sunny to eat food today, which is a great sign. But I do admit that his breakfast is served to him by hand feeding him each piece. So in addition to my typical routine, I am balancing Sunny. After I got my dad washed, dressed, and downstairs, we had breakfast together and then I took my parent's to the local farmer's market. My dad refuses to get out of the car, which is sad because he used to LOVE shopping for food. My dad really has three modes now... eating, sleeping, and pooping. He has NO interest in much else, and forget about making conversation.
Later in the day, I took my mom into two open houses. Frankly at this point, I feel like I could be a realtor in Oakton, VA! While touring the houses we met a lovely realtor, who is 78 years old. He doesn't look it, and has led an incredible life. He was even a prison of war. I always find talking with people who have trauma in their lives absolutely fascinating. Because you can't help but wonder.... how on earth are you still standing? How do you still smile, talk to people, and find a way forward? I say this, of course knowing that I too am a trauma survivor.
I then took my parents to Maryland for dinner. While at the restaurant, my dad had to use the bathroom twice. The second time I couldn't get the bigger stall in the bathroom, so my dad and I squeezed into a regular stall. I assure you it was a sight. I made a third trip to the bathroom with my mom. While waiting for her by the sinks, I was minding my own business, probably in a fog. All of a sudden a teenage girl came up to me. She said.... "you look beautiful." Honestly I thought she was talking to someone else at first, but then she looked right at me. I told her that he comment made me smile and that was so nice of her. Internally I feel like I am falling apart, so hearing this lovely comment, lightened my mood. A kind comment can go a long way and I wanted to tell her as such, but I figured a teenager really did not want to hear my lament.
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