Proud of my work -- 16 Years of Service

Thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive!

Dear Mattie Blog Readers,

It means a great deal to me that you take the time to write and to share your thoughts, feelings, and reflections on Mattie's battle and death. Your messages are very meaningful and help support me through very challenging times. I am forever grateful. As my readers know, I promised to write the blog for a year after Mattie's death, which would mean that I could technically have stopped writing on September 9, 2010. However, like my journey with grief there is so much that still needs to be processed and fortunately I have a willing support network still committed to reading. Therefore, the blog continues on. If I should find the need to stop writing, I assure you I will give you advanced notice. In the mean time, thank you for reading, thank you for having the courage to share this journey with me, and most importantly thank you for keeping Mattie's memory alive.


As Mattie would say, Ooga Booga (meaning, I LOVE YOU)! Vicki



A Remembrance Video of Mattie

March 25, 2020

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Tonight's picture was taken in April of 2009. Mattie was home between treatments and wanted a bowl of Cornflakes. He was admiring the shape of this flake and naturally I snapped a photo. It was these spur of the moment photos that truly captured our days together. With Mattie, even the shape of a flake could be interesting. It was the beauty of life with Mattie. 










Quote of the day: The coronavirus totals for today from Johns Hopkins:

  1. people diagnosed with the virus: 62,873 (it is hard to believe that half of this number is in New York state alone)
  2. people who died from the virus: 894


When I woke up this morning, I was greeted by a message from my childhood friend in New York. She wanted me to know her husband died today from the coronavirus. Not that I did not take the virus seriously before, but now I see someone directly affected. In particular she wasn't allowed into the hospital (as the hospital her husband was brought to only allowed patients, NO visitors) while her husband was hospitalized for two days. She received no information in those two days, until today when they called her to tell her he died. You can only imagine how she is feeling about all of this! Having dealt with a hospital system, I can't imagine having to separate from the patient! So much is wrong with this as patients need family advocates at all times in a hospital setting (on a good day for sure, but most certainly in times of chaos). 

I try to look for signs of hope amidst all the bad news. Today I saw Governor Cuomo cite the fact that the density control plan seems to be working in NYC. On Sunday the projected hospitalizations for the virus doubled every 2 days. Now the projection is there will be a doubling every 5 days. 

Since it was chilly and rainy today, we headed back to Roosevelt Island. As I knew no one would be there because of the weather. It was us with the birds and deer!
Sunny loves the Island. Just like Mattie did. It doesn't matter the temperature or the weather. He loves walking through the woods and is stimulated by all the squirrels and deer. 

When we walk on the Island, it is about a 90 minute break from reality. Which is very needed. 
Can you see all the deer? 
A close up of the white tail deer. Ironically they aren't as concerned about us as they are about Sunny! 


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