Tonight's picture was taken in October of 2008. Mattie was in the outpatient clinic, at the art table. But of course! Mattie and his art therapists had been working on a "haunted house" for several weeks, as Mattie wanted to decorate for Halloween. The house originated from a simple cardboard box that he decided to transform. With each visit to the clinic, more was added to the box. It was actually quite intricate, because inside the box was very spooky. Just like you would expected from a haunted house. On the outside Mattie created a witch and several ghosts flying over head. We had this cardboard house for the longest time and I am so happy we photographed it.
Quote of the day: There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love. ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
Today, I went to the salon to get my nails done. I visit this salon frequently. I am aware of the fact that the salon gets involved in philanthropic causes and recently they sent out a mass email to all their clients letting them know about their upcoming breast cancer fundraiser. All great! Today while checking out of the salon, the two young women behind the counter inquired whether I was going to make an appointment and support their breast cancer fundraiser day. Literally my response was 'NO!' I explained that I value their cause and hope it is a successful event, but that my focus and support goes to children with cancer. They just looked at me! They honestly did not know children get cancer, much less that 4 to 5 children die each day from cancer in the US. But what sent them over the edge was that I told them that my quest to support children with cancer was personal, since my son had cancer and died. When I tell you these women looked like they were hit by a train, I am not kidding. They both started tearing up and they couldn't speak a word to me. My intention was not to disrupt their day, but my intention was to educate them that not only women get cancer and need our support.
So back to Dr. King's quote. I get upset about October and seeing pink to some extent because of my deep love of Mattie. If I did not experience childhood cancer for myself and lose Mattie, would I still have this same disappointment about October? Unfortunately the answer is no. I can't get upset at others because I know that I potentially would be just like them, clueless. I long for clueless and wish I did not know children get cancer and die. Nonetheless, I see growth in my reaction. Years ago I had a visceral reaction to seeing pink awareness. But now I feel internally it is possible to acknowledge both without negating the other. Well at least in theory.
1 comment:
Vicki, The very sad point to me about Pink is not that their Campaign has been successful but that for reasons, I don't understand Gold isn't as big in September or enormous overall. In 1977, my Mom had breast cancer. She was 50 years old, the youngest in our family was 11. There was one group called, I think, I can cope. No pins, no pink, nothing. At some point, not sure when, woman & families joined forces & pink became important. I think this is fine. What isn't fine is that people don't have to know anyone, be a survivor themselves, they just have to want to make a difference for breast cancer, to join a team, wear pink, donate! Why can't Childhood Cancer be the same. Why can't people wear gold, donate their time & money. Why with Childhood Cancer are the people most involved people who have walked this path with their child. Why, I don't get it.
It is sad to me that I don't want so much pink either and breast cancer is big in my family. I also don't want pink pitted against gold. But the reality that children die everyday from Cancer. That so many are diagnosed daily. Survivors live but with lots of late effects and the real threat hangs over their head of relapse. Then when enough time has past, they need to watch for secondary Cancers. I have known several former patients that have died suddenly from heart attacks and some slowly from Organ failure due to the toxic drugs that saved them. Why isn't this news worthy enough of more coverage outside the Childhood Cancer Community. Why? It is a rhetorical question whose answe I keep searching for. I don't want to take anything from breast cancer patients, I just want equal time for kids with Cancer. I want people to recognize Childhood Cancer for the scourge it is on children & their families. Recognize, we all need to step up and do something for all the precious children who are told daily, they have cancer.
I want Gold to become important like pink. So families feel that the support, they deserve, every day, all year.
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