Tonight's picture was taken in June of 2008. It is hard to believe that a month after this happy photo, Mattie was diagnosed with cancer. That weekend, we took Mattie on a canoe ride along the Potomac River. This was a frequent occurrence for Mattie, but typically I wasn't included on those trips. That day, I was asked to come along, and naturally I did! As you can see, Mattie was smiling, and he was excited to show me his skills on the canoe and all the things he saw along the shoreline! Priceless moments.
Quote of the day: The snag about marriage is, it isn’t worth the divorce. ~ Suzanne Finnamore
This morning after dropping my dad off at his memory care center, I drove to an outpatient infusion center to get my six month dosage of Prolia (for osteoporosis). I can't tell you what hurdles I need to jump through every six months to get my insurer to cover this medication. My mom gets the same drug, but Medicare makes it super easy.
Over the last two months, my preauthorization for Prolia was denied. The insurer basically said, I had to take the generic equivalent. My doctor assured me that would be fine. So today, I was set to get the generic. When I arrived at the center, they were going to give me Prolia. I literally flipped out, because if I get a shot of Prolia, that is not authorized, I will be paying close to $2,000 out of pocket. No thank you! Any case, the nurse at this center was just lovely. We literally combed through my Cigna portal and she contacted her billing office. Turns out, that my insurer changed their minds at the last minute and did provide me a preauthorization for Prolia. Seriously, everything is a crisis.
Before the nurse gave me Prolia, she wanted to take my blood pressure. Given how worked up I was, she was concerned my pressure would be high. Nope! My blood pressure was low. She was stunned. Any case, who would guess that sitting in an infusion chair could be a break, could be relaxing? Well for me it is! It is a few minutes in which I am sitting still, I am not addressing problems, issues, or caregiving. The infusion center has a TV screen with piped in images of nature and animals. I literally was staring at that screen for ten minutes, and at one point I closed my eyes. It was the most peace I had all day.
It was in that moment of time, I did not think about my divorce, my 35 year relationship, the child we had together, the Foundation we built together, or the sheer chaos my life has been since 2023. It is unfortunate however, that this peace never lasts long. Because as soon as I walked out the door of the infusion center, reality hits...... responsibilities pile up, and the emotional pain and toll of a devastating divorce greet me once again.
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