Tonight's picture was taken in December of 2008. If you look closely, Mattie was in the center of his school's football team photo. We received this as a gift from the two head coaches of the team. They came over and hand delivered this framed photo it to Mattie. Mattie had the opportunity to meet the team several times and though these players were much older than Mattie, they were very kind and gentle with him.
Quote of the day: Today's coronavirus update from Johns Hopkins.
- Number of people diagnosed with the virus: 21,042,929
- Number of people who died from the virus: 357,132
This morning I received a text message from a friend of ours. We met Kristen, a pediatric social worker, when Peter and I served on a bereavement panel at a local conference in Washington, DC. Kristen was one of the panel's moderators. This panel took place shortly after Mattie died. So needless to say, our grief was raw and very transparent. Nonetheless, Kristen made an impression on me, because of her demeanor, insights, sensitivity, competence and compassion. Since that panel presentation, we have remained connected!
Today Kristen wrote to me because it came to her attention that her county's school board was creating an annual memorial day within the school system in order to remember and honor the life of a child who died. Given Kristen's experience as a social worker and working with many parents whose children have died, she is very in tune and sensitive to the life long grief child loss can produce. In other words, if a school system decided to acknowledge and celebrate let's say "Mattie Brown day," how would other bereaved parents within the school system feel about this? Was their child's life not worth celebrating, remembering, and basically not as important as "Mattie Brown?"
The loss of a child is very difficult and no two parents may feel the same way about the manner in which their child is memorialized. The manner may differ but what seems to be a given is that bereaved parents observe, listen, and absorb how our society reflects on the loss of their child. Unfortunately the lives of all children who have died do NOT receive the same attention, which can be very painful for those who remain behind. Which is exactly what Kristen is tuned into and is concerned about the reaction that bereaved parents within this school system will have to a special memorial day named after ONE child. What Kristen is expressing seems like a no brainer to me, yet she is getting push back from the school system. Honestly I have NO words, other than, the decision makers truly do not appreciate child loss and the impact of this devastation on family members. All I know is I would be deeply hurt for example if I heard that Mattie's school decided to create an annual memorial day for another student and yet NOT consider Mattie.
Meanwhile it was another full day in "paradise." I am worn out and as Scarlet O'Hara used to say, "after all tomorrow is another day."
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