Tonight's picture was taken on December 10, 2008. As you can see Mattie could hardly keep his head up, but really tried as Santa and Mrs. Claus were in the room delivering presents. Of course Santa got some coaching from Mattie's art therapists and child life specialist.... so he knew all of Mattie's favorite toys. Mattie picked his head up from the pillow, thanked Santa, and then returned his head back to the pillow.
Quote of the day: Today's coronavirus update from Johns Hopkins.
- Number of people diagnosed with the virus: 50,341,524
- Number of people who died from the virus: 802,014
I had a fascinating experience at the grocery store. Since I have moved to Virginia, I find the closest store to me is The Giant. Ever since I moved to the National Capital region in 1994, I have shopped at Safeway. If I had my choice, I would still be a Safeway shopper. But now I have to shop where it is geographically convenient for me. I have gotten used to The Giant and what I particularly love about this store are the people who work within it. Everyone is so kind, friendly, and they all try to help. Unlike my stores in the Washington, DC area, where most people seemed annoyed to be working.
In any case, there is a check out person at The Giant named Maria. She is one of the people there that I love because she is from New York and is spirited. This week she asked how I was.... so I told her about my trip to Los Angeles and mentioned that I moved my parents in with me. From that piece of information she told me how she cared for her mom and husband, both of whom have died. Maria immediately felt she related to me and I would have to say that this once again reminded me that caregiving and grief and loss do bond people together. It is like we talk the same language. Maria mentioned that when she was caregiving her siblings did not help at all and she felt alone and isolated. Which is not an unusual occurrence, as I know full well from my own caregiving research. She said the only person that gave her a break was her neighbor, of all people.
With that, she took my store receipt and literally gave me her home phone number and cell phone number. She said to me that she wants to help and that I should call on her any time. Who does this now a days? I am not saying I am going to do this, but her incredible compassion was noteworthy.
Like Maria, I too learned when Mattie was sick who I could rely on and who really could rise to the occasion to be supportive. Ironically it isn't always the people you think it will be! Which can be very startling and upsetting. Yet it is the reality and in some cases relationships never return to normal after a caregiving crisis. To this day I will never forget losing friends I had for 15+ years due to Mattie's illness. I honestly do not know why these friends abandoned our friendship, other than one told me that her family felt my situation was making HER sick. WOW, if it was making her sick, who knows what it (Mattie's cancer diagnosis) was doing to me!!!
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